Pocket Sized Dramas- September Daily Prompts
by sweeety
Summary: A series of daily fanfiction prompts, filled out for the month of November. Serialised into one big McHastings/Paily story after the first chapter. Enjoy.
1. September 1 - McHastings friendship

**Chapter** 1

To say they were an odd couple would be an understatement. If you had told either woman a year ago that they would be sharing a room, they would have laughed in your face. And yet due to circumstances beyond their control, Spencer and Paige found themselves sharing a room at Radley during an extended stay in Rosewood due to a freak snow-storm that blocked off the roads and kept the planes on the ground, delaying both Spencer and Paige's return home from their annual Christmas visits.

Paige and Spencer have known each other since Junior Varsity. On the field they got along just fine, even engaging in a little friendly rivalry at times, but off the field they barely spoke a word to one another. Things hadn't improved much by the time they'd left for College, and they completely fell out of touch, Paige heading to Stanford and Spencer getting into Dartmouth. Neither girl thought she'd see the other ever again, but alas, fate works in mysterious ways.

When Spencer found out her room was double booked she was furious. She came this close to creating a scene. She'd had no intention of staying with her mom and dad ever since they remodeled the place and turned her room into a second home office. Her sister's room was converted into a spare bedroom which her sister herself often occupied and the barn she'd refurbished and converted into a studio had been rented out for the year so there was literally nowhere for her to go.

Likewise, Paige didn't want to stay with her parents either. Things were kind of tense with her father after the accident that robbed her of her Olympic dream and he had never really quite forgiven her for 'robbing' him of the time and effort he 'wasting' trying to turn her into a champion. What made things worse were all the questions about her girlfriend. They kept hounding her about her. Where had she been and why hadn't she been there for her when she was hurt? When had she left and when was she coming back? Would she be helping Paige or would they need to stick around any longer? She found herself lying through her teeth and sending everyone away, facing the challenge of recovery and rehabilitation all on her own. It would've been easier to tell the truth but she respected Shana's privacy and she wouldn't guilt or shame her over leaving. She just wanted her to be safe and healthy and happy. She didn't want to be a burden to her. That's why she never picked up the phone. And now it was too late to do so anyway, she thought dejectedly as she limped through the front door of Radley with her cane in her hand and her luggage in tow.

When Spencer turned around it was as if the whole world slowed to a halt. Confusion marred her face as she took in the sight of her old rival and teammate limping through the lobby with an air of serenity and expertly veiled discomfort. She smiled politely as she passed her, barely remembering the fellow brunette, and when met with stunned silence she redirected her attention towards the check-in attendant and started inquiring about her reservation. It turns out however that her room had also been double booked and with the snow storm brewing overhead the hotel was booked out for the next few nights so they advised her to stay with friends or relatives if she had the option, or, if both occupants agreed, share the room with the other person that booked the suite.

* * *

Paige and Spencer looked at each other from across the table. Without field hockey they had virtually nothing in common. Spencer, was a lawyer who lived in Boston and had an extremely ambitious personality, having recently been made the youngest partner in her firm. Paige had unwound considerably when she came out of the closet and had become a much calmer and more mature and serene adult. She was a phenom on the field but her real passion was swimming. She made it to Nationals and was a shoe-in to get picked for the Olympics when her dream was tragically stolen by a drunk driver who sideswiped her bicycle as she was riding home from a party one early morning. She finished her degree in a leg cast and returned to the water as a coach as soon as she took the damned thing off. She started teaching toddlers on the weekends but before long she had worked her way up to High School seniors and now she was head coach in the university of Iowa. And while her own dreams were dashed, she gets to live a little through her students.

They caught up over their meal. It was comped, just like all their meals would be. The hotel offered to comp their meals and half the nightly rate if they decided to share in an attempt to placate them. Paige was about to turn the offer down, feeling like she was taking advantage of them but just before she could speak, Spencer opened her mouth and started arguing their case and before they knew it the cost of room service and everything in their mini fridge had been comped, two free massages had been booked by the in-house masseuse, and two tickets to the Christmas night cabaret had been procured for them, on the house.

Spencer would've kept going, talking about how she was going to sue their pants off if Paige hadn't physically attempted to drag her away. Spencer looked guiltily at the cane she almost knocked out of her hand and sobered up, thanked the manager and had the bellman take their luggage up while she and Paige received those complimentary refreshments at the lounge.

Everything was going pretty smoothly until an extremely unprofessional passing bellboy recognized Paige and asked her for an autograph. This off course set Spencer off and in order to subdue her Paige suggested they take advantage of some of that free room service and eat dinner in their room. To her surprise, Spencer agreed and led the way to the elevator and through the hallways like this had been her second home, instinctively taking off her heels and tossing them aside mechanically as soon as she entered the room.

Spencer dropped down onto the queen bed and shut her eyes as Paige dialed. They ordered, changed and watched tv before it actually occured to them that they would have to share a bed.

Although Spencer had an older sister she'd never let her sleep in the same bed as her, even as kids and Paige's parents believed in strengthening her character and wouldn't let her in their bed, even when she had had a nightmare so both women were inexperienced in sharing and the social conventions that went along with it. While Spencer had been to sleepovers, they'd all been sleeping-bag-on-floor type sleepovers and she never had to wake up next to anybody else and Paige herself had never been popular enough to be invited to any sleepovers at all apart from the ones her extended family threw and even then she'd never had a chance to share with anybody, usually taking up a couch or the floor, so when it hit them, both girls felt a sudden giddiness as this was something they never thought they'd get to experience, thinking they'd both missed their chance when they were kids.

They both tried to act aloof about it but the truth was they were excited to share a bed with someone else.


	2. September 2 - McHastings, Paily

**Chapter 2**

It was _cold_ that night. Spencer remembered it very well. It was cold and windy and she had a bit too much to drink with Emily. She stumbled out of the barn and around the side of the house, leaning against the side of the house to support herself as she carried the rubbish to the bin. She delicately threw away the bottles, trying not to be too loud and heaved the lid back on before stumbling up the steps to her house. She was almost inside when out of the corner of her eye she spotted a familiar looking vehicle parked stalling across the street. Without a moment's hesitation she leaped over to the car and let herself in.

"Holly crap, what are you doing?" asked a befudled Paige.

"Drive" ordered Spencer, her sight not fixed on her but on the window of her neighbor's house across the street. Paige did as she was ordered, fearing facing the wrath of a Hastings if she failed to do what she was told, and drove down the street until she reached a park. She turned the ignition off and waited for Spencer to talk but Spencer wouldn't start, looking at Paige, holding her gaze, full of questions.

"Okay, I know what this looks like-"

"You're watching her house? What are you, A or something? Seriously?"

"I know, it's wrong, but I just had to make sure she was doing it!"

"Doing what?"

"Keeping Emily safe... making her happy... being with her."

"Paige..."

"I can't just come up to her and ask her these things. Not after everything... How is she?"

"Honestly?"

"Honestly? No. Honesty's not gonna help me sleep tonight. Tonight I need to know she's fine and that she's happy and moving on with her life so I can crawl back into my hole and pass out without making a mess of things."

"In that case she's doing fine. She has completely moved on with Alison and she doesn't cry for you anymore. Since you've been gone she hasn't shed a single tear and it's all been coming up roses in her life. She got a promotion and she's got adorable twins and every night she and her girlfriend have amazing sex. Is that what you wanted to hear?"

"No, but it's what I needed. It's what I deserve after what I did to her."  
"Paige you didn't do anything to her. You did it _for_ her. You did what was best for her. And yeah it blows but you were the only one who had the balls to do that and for that I admire you"

"Spence-"

"No, you listen to me now. I never said it before but you're the best thing that's ever happened to her. I've done some stupid things like accusing you of being A and trying to keep Emily away from you and you've always just taken it on the chin. You never held a grudge or did anything to hurt her. And you've always supported her and done what was best for her, even if it meant breaking your own heart in the process and I have nothing but respect for you Paige but what you did? Leaving her? That was just dumb. I'm sorry."

"Why are you sorry? You're not the one who knocked Alison up with Emily's eggs or the one who told her just before we... Just as we got together. You're not the one who hurt her shoulder or killed her dad or the person who rammed into my car in college. You didn't do anything wrong Spence."

"I did. I should've fought for you. I should've fought and rationalized and made her see what was really happening but I was just so involved in what was going on with my own family that I just wasn't there... I didn't help you Paige. I wasn't there for you and Em when you needed me most and for that, I'm sorry. I'm sorry for all the ways I came between you and for all the time you wasted because of me because you didn't deserve that, Paige, you're a good person and you deserved to be happy with Em but you didn't get your happy ending and I'm sorry for my part in that."

A long pause fell between the two women. It was true that Spencer was caught up and while she might have had some influence, Paige knew that no matter what, the power always lay with Alison. While it would be easy catharsis to blame Spencer for not fighting for her and take it out on the girl who was essentially offering herself up as an emotional punching bag, Paige knew that it would not solve or fix anything, least of all her broken heart, so she gave Spencer a pat in the back and started the car back up. She pulled a U-turn and drove Spencer back to her house, dropping her off just barely out of sight of the DiLaurentis manor, and she said goodbye, and that she forgave her, and Spencer swore she heard Paige muffle a sob as she rolled the window up and drove away. She took one last look at the Christmas decorations inside Emily's house through the front facing window and went back in. She wondered why Paige would worry about Emily tonight when it hit her like a jackhammer. She checked her calendar and sure enough, tonight was the day before Thanksgiving. Emily always decorated for Christmas before that day because she'd be so excited 'cause her dad was coming home. She used to decorate until College, when her father passed away. Ever since then, this season in particular had been a time of mourning for Em. That's why she'd come to check on her tonight.


	3. September 3 - McHastings, Paily

**Chapter 3**

"Are you afraid of being lonely?"

"I'm afraid of being alone"

"I wont let that happen"

Spencer was tossing and turning all night long. She knew she had a lot of stuff to do tomorrow but she was just not getting any sleep. She was so frustrated she felt like screaming but she was too exhausted to even whisper-shout. Thanksgiving was yesterday and it'd been two days since she saw Paige. She kept an eye out all day hoping to see the blue tint of her car flash by but alas everything was cold and grey and drab. Emily had come over with some cherry pie. Alison made some crack about cherries and chapstick that made Emily look down and feel ashamed. She honestly wanted to choke the life out of her for making her friend feel that way.

She seriously considered texting Paige when that happened. Every time Alison did something that hurt Emily she was torn between grabbing the phone and texting Paige and grabbing the phone and flinging it at Alison's head. She couldn't do either however so she just faked a smile and moved the conversation along. The twins were aging nicely. Those blonde, blue-eyed genes were really strong. To this day they resembled Alison more than Emily. She supposed that's part of the reason she'd been tossing and turning that night.

She couldn't forget the look on Paige's face the other night. She was absolutely devastated and heartbroken and just a mess and she just wanted to reach out and touch that woman, who for the first time in a while resembled the broken-hearted earnest girl she saw on Emily's porch the night they drove to New York to pick Alison up. She wished they had never gone there.

She flipped her pillow over once more and snuggled into the side of her blanket. She tried humming and rocking herself and avoiding the thing that's been gnawing on the back of her head for what seems like centuries. She tried counting sheep and recalling every word she knew in Latin and counting in Spanish even but the nagging thought at the back of her head wouldn't go away until she acknowledged it and once she did, it would change everything so she flipped her pillow over again and screwed her eyes shut and tried to think of other things until she could no longer see the blue of Lilly and Grace's eyes in the back of her head.

Ultimately she drifted off to sleep, filling her head not with thoughts of deception and blonde haired spawn but rather soothing herself with thoughts of how gently Emily used to hold Paige and how quietly she'd catch them whispering to one another. She put herself to sleep imagining it her her that Paige was holding and whispering her sweet nothings to and showering with her love. Same dream she'd been having since Senior year.

Paige would ask her if she's afraid of being lonely. She'd reply that she's afraid of being alone. Paige would assure her that she wouldn't let that happen, before she collided their lips together the way a wave crashes against a rock.


	4. September 4 - McHastings friendship

**Chapter 4**

Paige hadn't expected a call from Spencer, especially so soon after their meeting but she was nevertheless kind of happy to hear from her. She didn't want the other girl to think there was any bad blood between them so naturally she agreed to meet her for coffee after work on Friday.

She didn't expect anyone else there which was why it came as a surprise when Alison of all people showed up with Spencer. Spencer desperately tried to gesture that she was innocent and that she doesn't know what Alison was up to but she predicted Paige wouldn't pick up on her signals and that she'd break out in a rage and get into a fight with Alison, and that Ali would use the fight to make her look bad but she was pleasantly surprised to discover she didn't know the other girl as much as she thought she did because Paige perfectly executed a vitriolic smile towards Alison and carried on conversing with her, while subtly dropping hints that she should get the hell out of here. Alison picked up on them of course but she just didn't care. It was far too tempting for her to stick around and try to rub it in Paige's face that she and Emily were doing swell.

Spencer could see the pain in Paige's eyes and wished that she could do something about it. With Alison watching her like a hawk the most supportive thing she could do was squeeze her thigh under the table. Paige responded by joining their hands in solidarity and continuing her verbal sparring with Alison. Paige gave as good as she got and Spencer was honestly impressed by her crafty work until Alison landed her finishing move and alluded to the 'family' she had at home. The one she stole from Paige. Spencer could see Paige's eyes fill up with tears as Alison smirked, spun on her heel and walked away and as much as she wanted to comfort her she knew that Paige would rather set her hair on fire than cause a scene so she let her go to the bathroom alone and dry her tears as she paid for the coffee. She wanted to have a word with Alison but she knew she'd just be adding fuel to the fire so she just paid for her coffee and her muffin and she left without saying a word.

When Paige returned she found no note or text, just some money and a half-eaten muffin. She texted Spencer but she never heard back from her. She figured it was for the best as being around the girl only reminded her of the things she had and lost so she finished her coffee, paid for her stuff, grabbed her jacket and drove off. She never even saw Spencer waiting by the bus stop, though if she had she might've not been tempted to offer her a ride.


	5. September 5 - McHastings

**Chapter 5**

It should not have been this hard for Spencer to smell coffee. She WORSHIPPED the stuff. She'd been drinking it since she was practically a toddler. She knew all her friends' coffee orders by heart and always had a cup ready, on the go or at home. So why was it so hard to gulp it down after that day she met Paige? What was the reason surrounding this phenomenon?

She shouldn't have brought Alison, true, she crapped all over any hope she had of reconciliation and ruined a perfectly good coffee date between her and Paige. Not a date date like couples do but just a friendly get-together. It's not like she'd ever have a shot with Paige after the way she'd treated her.

But Paige shouldn't have been so sensitive to Alison's bullying in the first place. Okay she didn't lash out and she let it all roll off her back until Alison made that dig about families which, to be honest, was a devastating blow, but Paige... okay, Paige acted magnanimously in retrospect; Spencer would've decked Alison if she was in her shoes. But she didn't. And that's what bothered her. She wanted to wring Alison's neck and make her pay for hurting Paige and Emily the way she did but she couldn't because she was Lilly and Grace's 'mother'. Spencer wished she could stop fixating on Paige and Emily's coffee colored eyes and Lilly and Grace and Alison's frigid blue ones. Okay, maybe not Paige's brown ones. She didn't mind those. She just hated seeing them cry out to her. They made her feel so weak.


	6. September 6- McHastings, Paily ANGST

Chapter 6

Emily kissed the girls goodnight and shut the light off as usual. She finished washing her face and getting ready for bed. She had changed into her pajamas and slid underneath the covers without making a sound. Alison barely looked up from the book she was reading. It wasn't until Emily mumbled a 'goodnight' that Alison acknowledged her presence and the needling began.

"Spencer's car broke down today. I was heading into town anyway so I offered her a ride and since she didn't want to be late -you know how Spencer is about being late- she accepted my offer. So I took her down to the brew and you'll never guess who she was meeting up there!" She needled. Emily wasn't really interested but she pursed her lips in an inquisitive manner to indicate that she cared in order to move the conversation along smoothly and finally get some sleep.

"Well, I'm not gonna keep you guessing, it was Paige! You remember her, right?" Alison asked, baiting Emily but Emily didn't bite. She was far too intrigued by Alison's gossip now and shocked to even care about her dig.

"It turns out that Spencer was heading to town to meet up with her. I know I had a lot of shopping to do but I was just so gosh-darn curious I stuck around for their little 'date'. It was adorable, you should've seen the way they kept looking at each other. I really felt like i was imposing so I left them to it at some point. I honestly can't believe those two would ever get together like that. Paige must have a thing for her rivals. But don't worry, Emily, you have _no_ competition in that department. Well, anyway, that's all for me, how was _your_ day?" She asked, continuing the conversation like she hadn't just dropped a bombshell on her and torn open her heart. Her best friend with _Paige_? Emily felt sick. She put on a brave face and carried on their conversation however and when it was over she turned off her light and drifted off into a restless sleep.

Emily woke up first the next morning -or perhaps she never slept- and was about to start up her morning routine when she noticed all the wet patches on her pillow hadn't dried out from where she was crying last night so she took her pillow-case off and threw it in the laundry hamper. She walked into the bathroom and closed the door. Then she sat down on the toilet as the shower was warming up and removed a loose tile from the bathroom wall, pulling out a little box from inside it. Alison woke up and banged on the door, asking for Emily to let her in and take a leak. In her hurry to hide the box, Emily forgot to replace the tile back on the wall properly.

Emily knew she wouldn't be bothered here. The Hastings never used their office during parties. It was out of limits for most guests but she was not a regular guest, she was one of the maids of honor. She needed a moment to herself because everything had gone by so fast and she couldn't believe what was happening. It was only a few months ago that she was in bed when she heard the news that Spencer was dating Paige and now...

She couldn't believe her ears when Alison told her. She thought it was another one of her sick jokes. Like the ones she used to play in High School. Something about Paige always brought the High School bitchy queen bee out of Alison and the last few months were just like soccer class. Spencer tried to incorporate _her girlfriend_ into the group on their group events, even going as far as to bring her along on Lily and Grace's birthday party. Heck, they even offered to throw it at their house.

 _Ugh, when did this become 'their' house?_

Emily remembers the summers they spent together as a group and how most of them were spent somewhere in this house, looking through magazines and trying on clothes and getting ready to go to the beach. This was the place she and her friends practically grew up, and now... now it was Spencer's special place with Paige. She shuddered as she thought of just how much she lost to Spencer. Emily was the first to bring Paige into this house and now Spencer would be the last. She felt a sharp pang of pain in her chest. This wasn't how things were supposed to go.

As Emily tried to fight back the tears Lilly snuck into the room behind her. She frightened her so much with her appearance that Emily almost hit her when she jumped back as soon as she was made aware of her presence. She did not expect any company. Especially from anyone as small as her daughter.

Lilly looked up in fear and cowered under the desk. Emily had to grovel for her forgiveness and promise her candy to get her to come out. When Lilly finally left her improvised shelter, she noticed her mom had been crying so she reached up and clumsily swiped at her face to make the tears go away. Emily smiled and leaned in for a hug when she heard the door open and Grace come in.

"What you doing momma?" Asked the blonde.

"Oh, nothing, just thinking about how big you guys have gotten and missing my little babies"

"We still here!" Lilly assured her and Emily smiled even bigger than before

"Yes, you are. But one day you're gonna grow big and strong and leave your poor old momma behind!"

"The way aunty Paige left you behind?" Asked Lilly, innocently. It was a striking blow to Emily but a simple question to the child. Emily hadn't even told them about her relationship with their 'aunty' Paige and determined to go off at Alison for broaching that subject behind her back.

"No, that was different. You guys are going to leave because you have to. Because you grow up and need to experience the world and have to get out there and try new things."

"Why did Aunty Paigey leave?" There goes that name again.

"Well, that was a different thing alltogether that I'd love to tell you about one day, when you are much older." She explained hoping the children would drop the subject because she really wasn't prepared to have this conversation as she hadn't thought of how to explain the chain of events that caused her to lose her without making it sound like the girls were at fault and she didn't want them to live with that guilt.

Their conversation was interrupted however when Hanna -who had been looking for the missing girls after having been assigned the role of baby-sitter for the event by Aria who had been growing sick of being left to watch babies by her husband who kept shirking his duties and abandoning her with their kids so he could write his new 'bestseller'. Aria used the word loosely in relation to Ezra. The truth was that his books weren't selling and they made the bulk of their income from Aria's job in publishing. Ezra was constantly a flop away from retirement and yet every time he flopped he made excuses about how there's a conspiracy against him and insist he be given another chance to chase his dream.

This has been going on for years now and the wage he made as a teacher paid him more in one week than he ever made as a writer. Unfortunately he quit that job to focus on his writing career and depended on Aria financially and when the kids came he promised that since he was home he'd take care of them but instead Aria was forced to pay for daycare when his negligence resulted in their oldest shutting their youngest in the fridge for half an hour out of jealousy while Ezra was taking a bath upstairs and getting some 'me' time. Aria swore living with him was like living with a rebellious teenager and once even joked that she felt like _she_ was the one in their relationship who preyed on a young student.

It was the darkest joke Aria had ever made and it was after child services contacted them for the first time. Things had gotten better after she put the kids in daycare, though despite being home all day, Ezra had still refused to help and she'd return to a messy house and unruly children every day, and be forced to take on several roles while Ezra relaxed after his stressful day of doing absolutely nothing at home.

Hanna came and told the girls there was a pair of cakes with a bunch of candles that needed to be blown out before she could have a piece of them and the girls playfully followed her out. Emily fell back and watched from the door to the study. They were growing up so fast that sometimes it seemed like she'd just blink and they'd be gone. Some dark, secret part of her, deep down kind of wished that could be true.

Alison crept up beside her and -when she saw Paige looking- put her arm around her waist. She let her left arm linger near her pelvis, twisting it just so in order to make the ring on her finger glisten in the intimate light. Paige looked away, wishing she could be anywhere but there.

Emily linked her hand with Alison's in solidarity, mistakenly thinking that Alison was offering her support, when she felt the wedding band around her finger had some company. She looked down and spotted the ring she bought Paige, restricting the blood flow in Alison's finger. The ex swimmer had daintier, longer fingers than the former queen bee and forcing the ring on her finger only accentuated her weight gain.

Emily recoiled as if she'd been struck. "Where did you get this?" she accused, knowing full well there's no way anyone knew about it.

"I found it in the bathroom. I know Christmas is not for a while but Emily, it was so beautiful I couldn't wait to wear it! Thank you!" Alison lied. She had seen the engraving and was sure this gift had been intended for Paige a whole lifetime ago.

"Alison that was not meant for you!" Emily whisper shouted, garnering the attention of a few of the party goers.

"Whatever do you mean?" Alison asked, starting to play the innocent victim and trying to goad Emily into giving her something she can use against her later.

"N-never mind" Emily diffused when she noticed people were looking her way. She made brief eye contact with Paige and could've sworn she saw pain mixed with concern in her eyes and the guilt made her want to explode. She looked down, unable to bear the weight of her gaze any longer and prompted Alison to lead her into the party room. Alison huffed and lead the way, resentful over the missed opportunity.

The crowd gathered around the table and the cakes as everybody sang happy birthday. The girls blew out the candles and Emily put on a smile on her face and told everyone that these tears she was crying were brought on by overwhelming joy. She avoided Paige's eyes for the rest of the night, went home, and cried into her pillow as Alison brandished the ring on her finger, bragging about finding her Christmas gift early.

Only Emily knew that the ring on her finger wasn't too tight because she didn't know the size of Alison's fingers but because it was intended for Paige. Because it was the ring she bought the first time she saw her after College, when she decided that she was gonna ask her to be her wife. This was the ring she was going to propose to Paige with. But with everything that went down she never had the chance to give it to her and she never had the heart to return it or throw it away. It was the only thing she had left of her, apart from the memories and the dreams and sleepless nights that were filled with tears.


	7. September 7 - McHastings, Paily

Chapter 7

Paige had been actually feeling good for a while. She hadn't thought things with Spencer were gonna be this smooth. She honestly didn't expect to ever see her again after that failed coffee meeting that Alison ruined but to her surprise a bunch of roses showed up on her doorstep the next day and the gifts kept coming until she relented and agreed to meet Spencer again, this time for an uninterrupted coffee at her house.

Their first 'date' was cute. They slurped their coffees and played board games on their knees in the lounge-room adjoining the kitchen as they watched 12 angry men. They ordered pizza and Spencer even had the guts to take a bite out of her ranch-and-buffalo dressing half of the pie before fake-retching and offering to share her much more reasonable flavor. They had pop corn and turned it into an all night movie marathon where they ended up weeping over Bette Davis at three in the morning before either of them even began to yawn.

Their second and third date were pretty similar. They'd spend hours in Spencer's family abode, lounging around and getting to know each other. They stayed away from those subjects. You know the ones that keep you up at 2 in the morning and make you question your entire life. The ones you think when you stare at the moon and the things you cry out in your sleep. But they did cover a lot of ground with the lighter and softer things. Turns out they had a lot in common and honestly they were surprised they didn't get along better before now.

When Spencer walked her to her car the morning after their third sleepover -because she wasn't going to turn her out onto the streets alone at three in the morning- she leaned in for a kiss and it only felt natural for Paige to reciprocate. Despite the fact that they had never spoken about this and labelled it explicitly as a date, it was understood by both girls when they were going in that it was, but the lack of talking about it eliminated all pre-date jitters and allowed for a more organic experience.

Spencer couldn't help but compare the kiss to all the ones she'd had before. It was firmer than Toby's and her lips were softer than Wren's even. She could hardly smell the pop corn on her breath as Paige still ate like she was training for something and something about the other woman was just irresistible and had her yearning to kiss her and hold her and feel her for longer. When Paige pulled back, Spencer felt like complaining that the kiss was too short when she remembered that this was only their first kiss, and it was only three dates in and while she may have wanted more, she still lived by the house occupied by the woman Paige had been in love with for most of her life so it can't have been easy for her to give in to the kiss with that looming over her head so she waved her off and ran in and smiled from ear to ear as she recalled the kiss and how perfect it all was.

Spencer initiated things for a while, Paige knowing it was her first experience with a woman and wanting to respect that and not rush her, but that only frustrated Spencer who wanted more and longed for Paige to touch her. Spencer on her half had taken on the role of the submissive one on more than one occasion but she gave as good as she got, Paige enjoying being the pampered one for the first time in a while. Spencer would pick her up and take her to expensive twelve course dinners and romantic getaways and take care of her and Paige would sweep Spencer off her feet with incredibly romantic gestures that were heartfelt, genuine and meant the world to the woman receiving them. Everything was perfect.

So why is it that when Paige got a fever that threatened to take her life and had to be rushed to the hospital that she kept calling Spencer by Emily's name and begging her to forgive her?


	8. September 8- McHastings angst

Chapter 8

Spencer didn't know how long she felt this fear. She figured it was the first time they kissed and she became keenly aware of how close exactly she had been staying to Emily and how quickly she was falling for the other girl. It might've been at the hospital. Or it might've been buried in her all along. It might've been when she found her outside that night before thanksgiving. When she first started having feelings for her. Could've even been back in High School when she started to think of the other girl as more than just Emily's girlfriend but also her own hero.

Whenever it began is inconsequential. What matters most is how it was realized, in a hospital room, in front of several of their closest friends and relatives and several members of the hospital staff team.

When Paige's fever pitched a new high, her brain was being fried and in her feverish delirious state she kept calling her Emily, crying and begging her to forgive her.

Emily wasn't even in the room when Paige started. It was just Spencer, her mother and a nurse. Paige looked her right in the eyes, holding her hand within her own shaky, cold hands, and called her 'Em'. She looked her right in those eyes she'd told her she loved, and called her her best friend's name, and started crying and asking her to forgive her. Her blood pressure rose, she squeezed Spencer's hands and she looked at her like she was hanging onto every word she said, as if the right words would lead her to salvation. She waited, with baited breath and when Spencer was too shocked to respond she repeated her words, and begged her once more.

Spencer's eyes filled with tears and she pulled her hand away from Paige's reaching ones, turned around and walked into the bathroom as her mom tried to reach out to her across the door. Then before long she heard Hanna and Caleb and Emily and Paige's parents squeeze in and overheard Paige calling out Emily's name in her feverish trance. Spencer pushed her way out of the room, avoiding eye contact and questions, shoved her way out of the hospital, and broke down behind the steering wheel of her car in the parking garage.


	9. September 9 - McHastings, Paily

Chapter 9

Alison wasted no time illuminating Paige on the antics she got up to while she was indisposed. She loved rubbing in that Emily panicked and ran as soon as she realized what was going on. The way she told the story you'd think Paige struck out trying to pick up chicks at a bar. She shook her head as she tried to get rid of the fuzziness that remained from her stint in the ER and stood up, determined to make things right with Spencer. However as well as she might have been she was still in no condition to walk or do pretty much anything other than wait and hope that Spencer will come visit her so they can clear the air.

Spencer never showed up though. She kept hoping and wishing she would, only to be disappointed every time she'd wake up and find the seat next to her bed was empty or occupied by her mom or dad or Emily. She had no reason to be there yet she stuck around, despite the risk of carrying Paige's infection to the twins or her students. Paige bitterly remarked to herself that she was more present now that they were not in a relationship than she ever was when they were together.

Alison only showed up once, to rub it in that she upset both women. She apologized to Emily who shrugged the incident off as just a slip of the tongue or a fever dream, but Paige gleamed from her demeanour that she took it in her stride. She would let her hand linger on top of Paige's from time to time or brush it against her arm. Nothing overtly sexual but things she wouldn't have done before. Things Paige knew Emily was using to lead her on. It reminded her of Junior year when Emily was still with Maya and Paige was trying to let her know that she was hers if she wanted her and she was being so overt about it and Emily _knew_ what she wanted and what she meant and she played right into Paige's hand, leading her on, only to stop her when she tried to kiss her later that same night.

Paige felt like a jackass and blamed herself but now that the dust had cleared on that memory she remembered the way Emily was looking at her all day like she was a piece of chocolate cake with coconut frosting. Something she knew she shouldn't have but, at the same time, something she was craving so hard she was practically shivering. Paige felt guilty when Emily turned her down but she wouldn't have tried anything if Emily hadn't been leading her on all day. Things were just like that again. Even though Paige is trying to move on, Emily's looking at her like she's a piece of cake again.

* * *

Paige endured the hospital stay as well as she could. She wasn't allowed a phone or her personal belongings as they were more-or-less quarantined and so it took until her release day to finally gain the ability to call Spencer. She couldn't get through the voicemail and she didn't have a ride home because her parents didn't know the shaky turn that things had taken with her and Spencer so she was about to hail a taxi when Emily pulled up next to her in the driver's seat with the twins in the back and offered her a ride home.

When Emily took a turn towards her old house, Paige intervened and corrected her, reminding her that she lived with Spencer now. Emily had completely frozen. Her mind had drifted back to when they were in High School and she was dropping Paige off after some 'extra training' behind the bleachers in the school pool. The comfort and safety she felt as she readjusted to reality was suddenly gone and she was suddenly sitting in her old car with her daughters and a woman she had no right to claim as her own. The truth hurt.

Emily pulled into the driveway of Alison's house and reached for her keys mechanically, after unbuckling her seatbelt. Fearing an awkward send-off, Paige bade the lot of them goodbye and shifted out of her seat before Emily even had a chance to respond. Emily watched her leave, furrowing her brow, wishing she had had a chance to say all these things that were running through her mind. Things she'd never be able to say in front of present company. She reached back with a fake smile and undid the girls' seatbelts before coming around and getting the door for them, letting them out of the car and shepherding them inside. She stole one last look at Paige, who was standing in front of Spencer's door, hesitating slightly, before knocking on the door and waiting. She wished she could see her eyes just once more but duty called. The girls were hungry and Lilly was dragging her inside by the arm.

* * *

The house was empty and dark. Paige knocked for a good five minutes but when nobody answered she let herself in. She found empty take-away boxes all over the kitchen and a basket full of dirty laundry by the washing machine. The dust had settled all over the place, like a single window hadn't been opened for weeks. She checked all over the place hoping to find a letter or a note but there was nothing, almost as if Spencer didn't live there anymore.

She checked the bedroom and found the bed untouched, with the same sheets she saw there last. And she checked the bathroom and it was bone-dry, without a single dirty towel in sight. Spencer hadn't been here in a while, Paige realized.

* * *

This cold and empty house felt like a punishment. A punishment for a crime she didn't commit. It wasn't her fault she was delirious! She had no control over what she said and she shouldn't be penalized for it! So she decided to rebel against the misery. She took all the take-out containers and threw them out, and then she washed the odd fork and dish that Spencer used the first couple of days that Paige was in the hospital. She ran herself a bath while the laundry was being finished and then she dried, sorted, folded and put away the clothes. She opened blinds and windows letting the sun in and sprayed the dust off the furniture and by the end of her little cleaning spree she was feeling loads better.

She shot Spencer a text begging her to come home so she can apologize in person and sat down and watched a movie while waiting for a reply.

* * *

The light flickered in through the window dotting the peripheral of Spencer's vision. She didn't remember where she was or how long she had been there. The only thing that mattered right now was the pounding in her head. She reached for an aspirin and downed it with a mini bottle of jack before lying back in bed and checking the message on her phone, whose alert set her headache off. Paige was home and she wanted to talk. Great. Spencer threw the phone away and reached for the Jack. She downed it in a couple of sips and lay back down. She felt Toby's hairy arms wrap around her exposed navel.

"Who was it, babe?" he mumbled in a sleepy haze.

"Nobody" Spencer assured him, snuggling into him and feeling his naked form spooning her back.


	10. Chapter 10 - Paily

Chapter 10

It had been days since Paige left the hospital and Spencer refused to come home. She slept at Toby's, ate junk, showered at the gym and worked. She sent Aria home to pick up a couple of her work shirts but apart from that, Paige hadn't heard from her in nearly a week. She was beginning to lose hope.

She felt like a squatter. A parasite living in Spencer's home, forcing her to seek refuge somewhere else. She thought about packing up and going home but she had no answers to give her parents if they asked her why she came. She was sure they'd tell her to work things out with Spencer first, before running away. And she would, or at least she was trying to, but the problem was that Spencer wanted nothing to do with her these days. She wouldn't answer her calls or texts. If it wasn't for the clothes that went missing every other day she wouldn't even know she came around.

* * *

Emily sat on her front porch with two mugs of steaming hot cocoa in her hands. It was close to 6 am and there was no one around but she knew Paige's schedule and she knew she'd be on edge and unable to sleep and that she would've already been up and about. Sure enough, a couple of minutes later Paige walked out of Spencer's house in some comfortable jogging clothes. Emily beckoned her closer and though hesitant, Paige walked on over to her. She handed her a mug with a smile and a greeting, and for a few moments they quietly drank. It was Emily that spoke first.

"How are you holding up?" she asked, eyeing her up and down, trying desperately hard not to stare too long at any of her favorite places.

"I've been better. But I'm not complaining." Paige replied, looking around. They were still alone but Alison was not the only reason she was avoiding getting too close.

"How are things with Spencer?" she asked, conflicted about whether she wanted them to be good and have Paige move on, or bad and Paige still be an option for her.

"Not looking so great. She still wont talk to me" Paige admitted, looking down and fiddling with a patch of dirt on the ground.

"I'm sure things will work out for the best" Emily vaguely assured her. What 'the best' insinuated was left open-ended.

"I don't know Em," started Paige, accidentally slipping into old habbits and calling her by her nickname "I think I really hurt her this time. We've argued before but never like this." she finished, looking forlorn.

"Paige, Spencer's a bit girl. She can handle herself. You don't need to worry about her. And I'm sure she knows you never meant to hurt her. She just needs some space to cool off and when she's done, I'm sure she'll come back and talk things out with you." Emily assured her, standing up from her perch and walking over to her, placing one arm around her, rubbing her back and one arm on her upper arm, giving it a gentle squeeze.

Paige looked down at the hand on her arm and instinctively reached out for it, wrapping her fingers around it and holding it. Emily leaned in for an embrace and Paige pulled her in, accepting it, letting her scent permeate and overwhelm her olfactory senses. Paige basked in the familiarity of Emily's arms. She smelled like sunshine, warmth and home and Paige could feel her resurrect the butterflies inside her stomach. This is exactly what she had been avoiding all this time. This perfect torture. Her eyes filled up with tears as she pulled away and started running down the street, throwing some excuse behind her back. Leaving Emily staring off in a daze, bewildered. Paige seemed to smell different somehow.


	11. September 11 - Hanna Rabies, Paily

**Chapter 11**

* * *

Lilly looked around but she couldn't find it anywhere. She could've sworn the coin was in Hanna's hand a minute ago. She looked over at Grace and she was just as confounded as she had been. They'd been bamboozled! That coin was a chocolate one! It was worth a lot to a girl their age! And Hanna went ahead and made it disappear! This was a travesty! They couldn't believe their rotten luck.

Lilly stood up and moved around Hanna but she couldn't find it. She couldn't see it anywhere. Grace looked behind the couch but the coin was nowhere to be found. Exasperated, Lilly turned to Hanna and mumbled gibberish. She was really letting her have it. Grace was cooing along while Lilly mumbled the angriest words she'd ever spoken and Hanna just sat there with a smug grin on her face. Lilly wished she could wipe it off. She picked up her toy phone and pegged it at her. Unfortunately the twenty odd years she had on her allowed her to snatch it mid-air and put it down without getting hurt. This only made Lil hurl some more angry syllables at her.

Hanna was cracking up. She was trying so hard to be serious but she just couldn't do it. This was just too funny. The babies were getting so worked up over the chocolate coin she'd pocketed when they were looking away.

As Lilly growled at Hanna, Grace wattled over to her mom. Emily was sitting by the telephone hoping it would ring, and staring out the window. Every now and then she'd pull up some new picture on her old phone. Grace didn't know why she kept it but then again she didn't really know much of anything. Lilly tackled Hanna as Grace sneaked a peek at the picture on the phone. Grace recognized her neighbor's face, as well as her mommy's, but the significance of her mother staring at these old photos was lost on her young, innocent mind. She did understand emotions though, and she could her mother was feeling upset so she reached up and gave her a cuddle before wattling back to her twin.

"Ok" Hanna announced, "I'm gonna do another one now, you ready?" she asked the garrulous throng.

The babies looked around the room, still trying to find the coin when with a flourish, Hanna reached behind Lilly's ear and pulled it out. Then, with a similar theatricality she pulled a coin out of Grace's ear as well and the tiny tots were so overjoyed they tackled her to the ground and covered her with hugs and slobbering kisses.

"You guys rock" Hanna called out from under the cat-pile as she continued returning sloppy kisses and hugs. Emily kept looking out the window, waiting for Paige to come back from her jog.


	12. September 12 - Spemily,

**Chapter 12**

Paige didn't come home again that night but Spencer did. She walked in sometime around midnight, drunk and alone, using a pilfered cane to steady herself. Jenna will just have to make do tomorrow.

Spencer rallied up her courage and started pounding on the door, waiting for Paige to let her in, but no one came so she knocked again, louder this time. The only person that heard was Emily but she was too conflicted to do anything to help. On the one hand she could sponsor a guess at where Paige had been, having been the one to drive her away and also being the only person that knew her inside and out...well, that may not be true anymore, she thought as she gazed at the drunken mess of a friend that was pacing around next door.

Lacking the synchronization (and patience) required to pick the lock, Spencer had let herself in through the window she'd have to get replaced the next morning, cancelled out the alarm Paige armed promptly every time she left the house, and was now running around like a lunatic, looking for Paige in every room of the house. Emily could almost feel Spencer's heavy footfalls as she ascended the stairs calling out her name. It was very late and she was making a lot of noise and Emily tried to remember if she shut the nursery window. The babies were usually heavy sleepers but they had been woken up by the odd storm every now and then.

Spencer was in her room now and Emily could see her through the window. She flopped down onto the bed and lowered her voice as if she was speaking to someone who was in the same room. Emily squinted and saw that Spencer was pulling the blankets down, and looking around confused, as if she'd genuinely thought that Paige had somehow to flatten herself against the bed and she was expecting to roll back the covers and see her. She just sat there, stunned for a couple of minutes before she started yelling again.

Emily grabbed her phone and shot her a text. She watched Spencer fish it out of her purse, read it and then chuck the mobile onto the bed as she left the room. A few seconds later she saw her walk out the door and next thing she knew she was pounding on her door. Emily sighed as she rushed downstairs to greet her.

Spencer's garbled 'hello' gave way to calling her a skank for stealing Paige away from her. Emily assured her that no such thing had happened but her words weren't going through at all. She sighed again before she dragged her out onto the patio, grabbing her keys and shutting the door behind her. She wrapped an arm around her and led her to her house where she prepared some painkillers and water for the morning and settled her in. They needed to talk as well, but she wasn't going to get through to the other girl in her current state so she put her to bed. She sat down next to her and stroked her hair as she listened to her mumbling. Spencer said:

"It isn't fair you know, Em. It isn't fair that everyone else gets everything and I get nothing. I just wanted one thing. I just wanted Paige. I know she's yours and I know Caleb was Hanna's and Ezra is Aria's but I couldn't be with Toby, at least not after Alex, and I didn't want to start anew with no one else. I saw Paige outside your house and she was still so broken up about you. She's always gonna love you, I knew that, I know you guys are Paige and Emily but I just thought that maybe with time I could occupy a space in her heart just like you do. She has such a big heart and it's not fair of you to take up all of it!"

Emily however couldn't make that out because Spencer was mumbling and slurring her words. She wasn't going to push her, just try to get her to rest and sure enough, eventually Spencer settled. She stood up to leave as Spencer mumbled her last words. These ones she caught. She said "You don't deserve her, you know."

Emily couldn't agree more.


	13. September 13

**Chapter 13**

Emily was quiet as a mouse but Spencer's shouting had done its damage; Alison was up. She was sitting up in bed, leafing through a magazine, waiting for Emily to return. The longer she took, the angrier she got and by the time she spotted Emily walking through the door, she was furious. She didn't waste a moment, immediately laying into her.

"Did you put Speedy to sleep?" She seethed.

"Alison?"

"That's why you went over there, right? To put Speedy Spencer down for the night?"

"Yeah, she was upset and drunk and-"

"And helping your friend out was more important than focusing on your family."

"NO! Look, I'm sorry if the noise woke you up, but what was I supposed to do? Let her break down the door? Leave her out in the cold like that?"  
"Oh, here comes Emily, the great protector. Saving maidens in distress since.. well since around High School... that's how you get them, isn't it? First you save them and then you-"

"ALI! What's gotten into you all of a sudden? I don't even know why we are arguing right now!"

"We're arguing because I know your type. You like the weak and vulnerable type and Spencer happens to be both right now, so I'm asking, what is going on between you?"

Emily was revolted by Alison's insinuations. She couldn't even respond. She just looked at her in disgust and shook her head before reaching for her pillow. Alison wasn't letting this drop so easily though and as Emily reached down she grabbed her wrist and started laying into her again.

"That's how you got Paige too, isn't it? You swooped in when she was feeling low, back when she was still a baby-dyke, so far inside the closet she couldn't see the light of day, and you reached in and pulled her out and made her fall in love with you." Alison stated

"Ali, stop!" Emily cut in but Alison wouldn't be sated tonight, she just kept going.

"And she never fell out of love, did she? Even though she got up and ran the moment she found out about the babies, like a coward. She couldn't even hack it then so why would Spencer be worried about her getting to you? She shouldn't be, Paige doesn't have the balls to try." She asserted

"ALI!" Emily cried out

"But judging by the ring I found, maybe you aren't over her either. Maybe the person she's afraid of isn't Paige, it's you." She insinuated, smirking, looking Emily straight in the eyes.  
"No!" she shot back.

"Yes, it is. You're the reason she's been drinking!" she accused.

"NO!" she cried out on the verge of tears.

"Yes! Face it, honey, you're a homewrecker."

"No." Emily replied, weakly.

"You're a nasty little slug that worms its way into people's brains and their relationship and makes its home there, pushing out every last bit of goodness from inside them and bringing out the worst in them. Look what you turned Spencer into? And Paige? Where is she? I bet you were the reason she didn't come home tonight. You're cancer Emily. You ruin everything."

Emily snatched the pillow and turned to walk away. She was halfway to the door before Alison continued her assault.

"You better not infect our house with your disease. It's not just me you have to worry about, it's the babies. How quickly they grow up. One minute they're here, and the next? They're gone!"

Emily's blood ran cold as she processed Alison's words. She wasn't saying what she thought she was saying, right?

"We wouldn't want them to grow up without their second mother but, hey, if anything happens, it's best if they start over somewhere new where they can forget about their moms breaking up and not have to worry about visiting and splitting up for the holidays and stuff like that."

She was. Emily slammed the door on her way out. As she walked to the couch she heard a noise and looked up to see that Grace was awake. She tucked her in again, kissed her goodnight and went down and set up the couch for the night although she couldn't sleep. She just kept thinking about Alison's words and every time she'd get as far as the 'homewrecker' part a fresh wave of tears would form. She didn't ruin things for Spencer, did she? She cruised to her facebook page and scrolled down to the pictures. It's funny how many smiling ones she'd put up ever since she started dating Paige.


	14. September 14 - After the Storm

**I was going to update a lot sooner but I got super busy. Anyway here's the next lil one. Thanks for all the reviews and comments. I love reading them. Seriously do not hesitate to write whatever it is you want. And to the people who hated a certain character before, just wait til you read this one. Should I put the prompts in for every chapter? And if so, should I put them at the top and spoil it a bit or bottom? What do you guys think?**

 **Chapter 14**

Lily didn't exactly expect everybody who saw her to drop everything and focus on the new haircut she was sporting, but she wasn't exactly prepared for this level of apathy either. She thought that Emily might be approving but she was too busy trying to talk Spencer down off the edge. Emily guiltily avoided eye contact and Spencer looked at her accusingly every other minute. Something was definitely off. And Alison for her part mostly stayed in the kitchen and binged on snacks. She leafed through magazines and baked sweets and ate and waved her off to go play with her sister in the living room. At least Grace was impressed. She reached up and ran her hand over the bald patch in the center of her head and it tickled a little bit.

Mommily was the more perceptive of the two parents, but Mommily was nowhere to be seen, having left for work early and spent the entire afternoon next door with her friend. Momison was fuming and calling her every few minutes, shouting obscenities at the other end of the line and then hanging up. Grandma was their only hope, so, they both reached for the landline in the living room and started pressing random numbers to no avail.

Alison heard the noise from the kitchen and it only made her angrier. She stormed into the living room, snatched the phone out of their hands and slammed it down before shouting at the girls to go upstairs to sleep if they're not gonna behave. The girls nodded as they blinked away their tears and sat down quietly on the couch, staring at the other side of the living room, doing nothing, like living dolls. When Alison left the room they let the tears run down and Grace reached out and held Lily's hand. Momison was awful.

Alison stormed back into the kitchen and continued talking on the phone. She was threatening Spencer that if she didn't get her shit together and send her Emily back home immediately, that she was going to go down there and drag her back. Something smelled weird so she checked the oven and sure enough the cake she made was ready. Not just ready but in fact burnt! She reached in and grabbed it without a glove, burning her hand in the process and recoiling in pain, her arm shooting back in the process. Only thing is that Grace was standing right behind her, wanting to apologize but not really sure over what, she just stood behind Alison and waited for her attention, only instead, she ended up getting smacked by Alison's arm as she jerked it back, recoiling from the burn.

"FUCK! WHY WON'T YOU WATCH WHERE YOU'RE GOING YOU LITTLE SHIT?" Alison screeched.

Grace stood in the doorway taking it all in. Lilly, on the floor, sobbing, while Alison stood over her, cradling her own arm and shouting at her. She walked over her to get herself some ice for her hand and waltzed back, pulled the tray out of the oven, threw it on the counter, slammed the oven door shut and walked away, leaving Lilly sobbing in her shadow. Grace closed in as soon as the danger was gone and she grabbed Lilly and pulled her to her feet before taking her hand in her and leading her to their bedroom. Lilly wriggled into her bed and cried into her pillow as Grace protected her by crafting a tiny fortress out of stuffed animals at the foot of her bed. She climbed onto the bed behind her and hugged her from the back as she cried. This was the position she found them in when Emily came home a couple of hours later.


	15. September 15 - In the eye of the Storm

**Two in one night because that's how I roll. And also because I had time and inspiration.**

 **Chapter 15**

The silence was the first clue that something had gone wrong. The girls were usually still up at this hour and they would always greet her at the door but today the house was completely quiet and the girls were nowhere to be seen. Emily knew they were with Alison so logically nothing would have happened to them, and while there was always that tiny voice in the back of her head she assured herself that A was gone and that there was no way that A would have gotten to them.

She hung her jacket and locked the door, leaving her keys by the door and walked into the kitchen, where the lights were all lit up but there was no one there. She saw a tray of mystery food on the counter that she assumed Alison made herself from scratch and felt obliged to sample a bit so she could at the very least say that she tried it, even though it looked like it'd been in the oven longer than she'd been inside her mother's womb. She scraped some of the burnt, coal-like buildup from the side and peeked underneath but she was just as confused as ever about what the hell the food was so in order to avoid food poisoning she decided to just skip dinner for the night. She tried smelling it and even stuck her tongue out and tried tasting a little but 'burnt' was the only discernible property she could taste and smell so she quietly threw her piece in the trash and made a mental note to empty the rubbish out later tonight, before Alison had a chance to check it, and then proceeded to walk up the stairs towards the nursery.

The door was ajar and the lights were off and at first she didn't even notice them but the kids were there, nestled together in one bed, one over and one under the blanket. She signed and moved to shift Grace, but then decided they were just too peaceful to disturb so she pulled the blanket off the other bed and tucked Grace in. She kissed them both on the forehead and shut her door on the way out and then she made her way over to her bedroom where she found Alison sitting up with an ice pack and a bottle of wine.

'Here comes round two' she thought as she shut the door behind her and got ready to start.


	16. September 16

**Another one tonight. I want to see how many I can do tonight. Depends on how much spare time I get.**

 **Chapter 16**

It's been two weeks since they last saw each other but here they both were. They didn't arrange to meet like this. Spencer was supposed to be at work and so was Paige and yet they both found themselves drifting to the place where it all started, but for different reasons.

Spencer was coming to apologize to Emily for dragging her into this mess. She finally admitted to herself that it was all paranoia on her end and that Paige hadn't really given her any reason to doubt her commitment to her. Paige was stopping by to beg Emily to stop leading her on because she was tormented and torn and she didn't want to keep hurting.

Of course neither one of them was willing to admit that to the other so the conversation was rather stilted.

"Hey" started Paige.

" _Hey_ " mocked Spencer. "You don't write... you don't call... what's a girl to think?"

"I'm sorry. I just had a lot on my mind."

"I'll bet."

"Can we just please stop? Can we get a do-over? I don't like the way this is heading and I don't know how to make it stop."

"It's easy, just admit you want her so we can be done."

"Whether or not that's true, it doesn't affect the way I feel about you."

"And how is that?"

"I love you"

"Yeah, but you love her too."

"She was important to me, it's true, I'm not gonna deny that. She used to be the reason I woke up in the morning but what we had was gone, Spence. It's not there anymore. You can't breathe life into something that's already dead. Believe me, it's over. Even if I wanted to - which, I don't, but even if I did want to- be with Emily again, she's got Alison now" she choked out "And she doesn't need me anymore."

"She might not need you but what would you do if she wants you? I can't be your last resort, Paige, I can't do that. I can't live my life hoping Emily doesn't wake up and decide to take back what was once hers"

"Don't I get a say in this? Do you really think I'd up and leave you like that? You think so little of me?"

"No. I don't. But I know who you'd want to be with, even when you're with me, and I know my heart wont take it."

"Spencer, what can I do to help you believe that you're the one I want to be with?"

"There's nothing you can do to make me believe it."

"So I guess this is it then? Goodbye?" She asked, completely deflated.

"Yeah, I guess so. It's the best thing."

"I hope that one day you see the truth"

"You know what they say about hope? Breeds eternal misery."

Paige sniffled once, trying to hold back the tears, and she pulled Spencer closer by the lapels and held her close for a moment. She wanted to kiss her but she didn't want a last kiss. She didn't dare. So she settled for resting her forehead against hers and breathing in the same air for as long as possible. When she felt the breeze threaten to freeze the tears that were now streaking down her face she pulled away and started walking back to her car. Before she left though she whispered "You were NEVER a last resort or a second pick or any of that crap. You were always Spencer"


	17. September 17

**Post nap update**

 **Chapter 17**

Hanna drew another letter, shuffled her deck and scoped out her options. She had a couple words she could use now but if she waited she might get something even better later on down the line. She looked over at Aria and Spencer who had ridiculously good streaks going and wondered what they had going for themselves before deciding to basically just give in and go for the simple ones right now and bide her time and wait to use the special stuff later. She put down a few letters and formed a small word and received a modest combo which she wrote up and watched as Spencer put down 'quixotic' and won the game. Hanna was pretty sure that word was made up but Aria backed Spencer up and insisted it was real.

Hanna returned everything but one of the 'i's and waited for Aria to shuffle the letters before returning it to her deck.

"So... how are things going with you and Paige?" She asked. She expected something along the lines of 'fine' or 'good' and thought she was making small talk but when Spencer's expression darkened she knew she had put her foot in her mouth.

"It's not going anywhere." Spencer admitted as she looked down at her letters. She had a pretty good haul and was looking confident in her ability to win this game.

"What do you mean? asked Aria, "What's going on?

"It's over. She's packing her bags as we speak."

"Spencer-" Aria began but she was cut off  
"I don't want to talk about it" Spencer declined.

"But Spence-" Hanna tried to intervene but was also shut down.

"I'm fine. She's fine. It's over. It's for the best. I just want to finish this round of scrabble and go home right now. And don't think for one second I didn't see you hoard that 'a'"

"It was an 'i', and are you sure?"  
"Yes. It's for the best."


	18. September 18

**There's a note for context after this chapter.**

 **September 18**

Paige took her time grabbing her things, hoping that by doing so she was creating a chance for Spencer to run into her but it was all for naught. She gingerly placed a 'goodbye' letter on her pillow, next to a purple flower and then picked up her duffel bag and started towards her car. When she'd filled up the trunk she'd closed it and turned around to look at the house one more time. It looked so cold now, and dreary and filled her with pain rather than the feeling of excitement she used to feel whenever she walked down the footpath towards it before tonight. She looked over at Alison's house and shuddered as she noticed that Emily's eyes were on her. She quickly turned away and headed for the door, trying to lock it and be gone before Emily caught up to her but she was too slow and before she even managed to turn the key she heard a set of familiar steps advancing towards her.

"Paige, wait, please" She begged

"No, I have to go, I can't be here anymore" Paige rushed out, panicked.

"Paige please, I need to talk to you!" Emily cried out but Paige had picked up speed and made it all the way around the car before she stopped.

"Please Emily, let me go, it's easier for the both of us" she beseeched

"I can't!" She yelped, exasperated. "I can't let go because really, after anything, I still want you!"

"Please don't do this" Paige begged as Emily walked around the car to meet up with her.

"I need to hear that you want me too. I need you to tell me that you do so I can do what I've been dying to do all this time because I don't think I can handle it if you don't tell me the truth. If you make one of your self deprecating jokes or deflect I will die so please, Paige, tell me the truth. Tell me you still want me too." Emily implored her but she was adamant.

"I can't!" Paige sobbed looking away.

"I know..." Emily nodded, trying to swallow the lump in her throat. Her hands had found their way to Paige's throat and wrapped themselves around it and she was but a breath away now. It was so dangerous to be this close but she felt she would die if she stood any further. She leaned in and tried to kiss Paige as she cried and Paige stubbornly pursed her lips together to stop her. Emily cried harder as Paige pushed her away, got into her car and drove off. By the time she left the driveway Emily was in hysterics. This was it. Paige was really gone.

*A royal color, purple flowers symbolize dignity, tradition and success. A bouquet containing purple flowers can be symbols of admiration and adoration. The flowers are both an expression of adoration of Spencer and a passive aggressive call out for leaving her because she considered herself #2 in Paige's heart and chose 'dignity' rather than love. Ironic though considering the ending where she shot Emily down because she was married, rather than choosing to be with her out of love.


	19. Chapter 19 - Devil

**Chapter 19**

Alison fumed as she trotted down the alley towards her car. Ever since Emily's useless catatonic stint she was stuck with all the shopping and taking care of the kids. If she'd known they'd be such hard work she would've never had them. She only had them because she thought that Emily wanted them in the first place, and now? Now she's stuck raising them! This was bullshit, in her opinion.

She turned a little too fast and knocked the adult diapers off the shopping cart. Yet another 'present' from Emily. Who knew that child birth could have complex and long lasting complications? For her it was incontinence. She dreaded cooking specifically because of the spices. One small pinch of pepper could have her running for a fresh pair of underwear. She was constantly a sneeze away from embarrassment.

So Alison piled the shopping into the cart, got in the driver's seat and started reversing out of her parking spot. She thought back to the events of the other day and felt a little glad that Emily was in this state right now because she'd give her so much trouble for what went down. It wasn't such a big deal, she rationalized. 'These things happen, it's unavoidable. It could've happened to anyone. Just because she'd been drinking a little doesn't make her negligent. And really, it was all Emily's fault in the first place for leaving her alone with the kids; she should've known better. It was a really stressful day and Alison was anxious and panicky and it was totally not her fault, she told her self.

So what if she hit one of the babies? The greatest benefit of having twins was that there was always a spare. If anything happened to Lilly, Grace would be there to take care of her and vice versa and really, they could supervise each other by now, they were old enough! They were two or three or something. They were perfectly capable of taking care of themselves, they just didn't want to.

Those selfish, greedy leeches. Having to spend all her time watching them and feeding them and wiping the shit off their asses really pissed Alison off. There were other things she'd rather be doing. Like reclining on a beach somewhere, being catered to by handsome cabana boys and stuff. This was NOT the trajectory she wanted her life to take. By now she figured she'd be married to some rich and powerful exec, honeymooning in Fiji or Tahiti and flirting with pool boys and surfers while he was busy micro-managing his business over the phone. Not losing her hair due to stress, putting on pounds by the dozens and picking cheerios off her favorite sweater.

She was pissed. And when she was pissed she drank. Only if she drank Emily would bitch about her drinking habits 'like she's a motherfucking saint'. No, no drinking for Alison. 'We have to keep treat our bodies like a temple' Emily would say. And what she'd really mean is that 'she' had to keep from doing anything fun or enjoyable while Emily got to destroy herself, pining over that 'pigskin' loser. Well this wasn't fair and Alison never signed up for this arrangement. She only had those bastards because she thought Emily wanted them. Well, if Emily's done playing house, then so was she.


	20. Chapter 20 - ANGST self harm warning

**Chapter 20**

It was a misty day. Not cold enough to put on a sweater but too frigid to walk out in your Summer clothes. The early morning dew and fog combined with the cloudy sky mired the world in a desaturated tint and Emily Fields refused to leave her bed for the third day in a row. Alison tried begging, threatening and even attempted to get rough with her, pinching her nose until she nearly suffocated and poking her sides and 'gently' tapping her face but Emily did not respond, she just lay there, staring out the window, watching the condensation build up and trickle down the glass. Alison gave up eventually and stormed off into the nursery to get the kids ready for daycare.

Emily shuddered when she heard the door slam behind Ali and the kids. She knew Alison would just keep pushing her but she just couldn't bring herself to care at that moment. She lay on her back and stuck her arm up in the air, watching her bracelet hang loosely down her wrist, marking a tiny path of its own. Everything was moving and rushing and Emily was just... bored. She was bored of everything. She just couldn't bring herself to care about anything anymore. She hadn't moved, eaten or showered and with nobody taking care of her the stench was starting to build up.

Alison refused to take care of yet another 'kid' on a 'tantrum' as she called it so she delegated to her friends but they had all been too busy or too ignorant to care. Apart from the odd phone call from Hanna or the texts from Aria she hadn't heard a peep. And Spencer? Spencer hadn't made contact in days.

Emily watched the shadow the bracelet cast on her skin. She thought about all the scars she studied on Paige. The ones that marred her face and her thighs... the ones she and Alison helped her put there. She wondered if it had been a knife she had cut herself with or razor blades. Or maybe it wasn't even a cut at all... maybe it was burns. All those hours of studying and she still wouldn't pass a course on Paige's anatomy. She was hopeless.

She remembered feeling those bumps sharply contradict the silky smoothness of her legs as she caressed her. She remembered the first time they were intimate and how embarrassed Paige had felt. She still feels guilty for helping make Paige feel ashamed of her own body. She feels it's only fair if she had some matching scars of some sort in order to compensate but what good would it do? So what if everybody knew how horrible she was or how horrible she felt, it still wouldn't bring her back. Punishing herself just for the sake of punishing herself so she can feel better would only benefit herself and she was in no mood to do herself any favors.

Still, she wondered what it would look like if she took a razor blade or knife to her wrists, really slowly, in the bathtub. She imagined watching the blood run down her arms the way condensation runs down her window pane. Splitting little lines that start off good and well meaning but end up doing irreparable damage to everything they touch, just like her, her friends and Alison.

She needed to get out of this funk.


	21. Chapter 21 - Emily

**Chapter 21**

It's Summer now and she's walking through a field of flowers. The aroma is invigorating and the vibrant colours of the petals are a feast for the eyes. She doesn't remember how she got there but she's happy. She follows a trail through the meadow into a forest. The branches from the trees poke and prod her as she walks past and like they're made of knives, they shred her clothes as she walks past but she doesn't care. She's made her way over to the lake now just below the waterfall and there, bathing in the water like a woodland nymph is Paige. She looks effervescent and as she calls out to her she turns around and smiles and wades over to her. She descends into the water and they both reach out, intertwining their fingers together. Paige smiles again and Emily knows everything is going to be all right.

She woke up feeling a strange calmness wash over her. She knew what had to be done. It was going to be difficult but it would be worth it.

* * *

Emily got out of bed for the first time in a week. She groaned as she looked at herself in the mirror. She jumped in the shower and washed away a week's worth of filth and stress along with any trace of doubt from her system. When she was clean and ready she threw on her old Sharks swimsuit and grabbed her gym bag and went on her way.

As much as she needed to talk to Paige what she needed more was a sense of normalcy and getting back to her old work out routine would be a great start. She drove to the gym, swam for half an hour, drove to the supermarket and picked up the groceries Alison always forgot, then finished out her day by picking the kids up and driving them home at the end of the day, picking up dinner along the way and feeding the girls before tucking them into bed.

When they asked for a bedtime story Emily told them of a woman and a water nymph who fell in love at first sight and walked through the forest hand in hand. They liked this story, if only for the way their mom's face lit up as she recalled it. It wasn't a play-by-play of her dream but it was the closest she could come to sharing it with anyone.


	22. Chapter 22

**September 22**

 **AN: This one took a while longer too. I just had to stop and scrap and restart because it wasn't working out. What I started on when I started this chapter was taking too long.**

 **Update 25/10: I'm not on hiatus, and I'm not quitting. But I'm going to finish writing it before I post the rest of the story because I'm not quite sure about where I'm going with it and I want to finish writing it and see if I need to rework it and the next few chapters are super interconnected so if I change one I might need to change all of them which is why I can't get started on posting them. What I can say for sure is that th** **ere's going to be 31 chapters and right now I'm working on number 28.**

Spencer was in a crash. Nothing big, just a little fender bender. She was left with a broken arm and a few sore ribs. Emily desperately needed to see her and make up with her but her mom was away, the babysitter sick and Alison was at work so she'd have to bring the twins with her. Under usual circumstances she dreaded bringing them to a place where there's people that are ill but she was too busy worrying about Spencer to care.

Paige was the first to get the call. Apparently she'd been Spencer's emergency contact when they dated and she was too preoccupied to switch it back to her mom. She'd changed it in the first place because she knew that if anything happened to her, Paige would come. She was not wrong.

The moment she heard that Spencer was injured she grabbed the keys to her house, hoping they still fit, and let herself in to prepare a bag of clothes for her. She grabbed her favorite pajamas and a few pairs of warm cozy socks. She had first hand experience with cold hospital feet and wanted Spencer to be as comfortable as possible. She grabbed her favorite book of French poetry and her laptop and bag and even packed her a spare blanket. She eyed the room one more time before leaving, making sure the house was clean and neat. Everything was just as it was the last time she was here, she sighed as she left one more time.

At the hospital she waited for a normal hour to call Spencer's mom and friends. She let her go in first and talk to her daughter when she'd woken up. By that time Hanna had woken all the liars up and they were on the way and though Peter Hastings was out of town for a work conference, Melissa was already there and raring to go check on her little sister too. Paige was afraid of what she'd do so she stayed out and handed Melissa the bag on her way in.

A few hours later the whole gang was there: Caleb, Toby, Hanna, Aria, Spencer, Emily and Paige, as well as the twins. They all sat around Spencer's room cracking jokes and having fun. Aria coaxed Paige into entering and after a few awkward moments, everyone was laughing like old friends again. Emily had sat down next to Paige and shifted so that they were almost shoulder to shoulder. The girls laughed by their mother's other side. If you'd seen them you might have thought they were a family.

The call came about an hour later. Emily's second in command had to go out of town and there was an incident at the pool requiring her attention. She had to drop the kids off somewhere but there was no one around. It was just her and Paige in the parking lot on their way out. Hanna had to go back to New York with Caleb and Aria had a deadline. With Spencer in hospital that left no one but Paige and she could never ask her that. It would be too much. But she was desperate.

Paige never could say no to Emily. That's how she ended up driving her to work when her own car broke down. She would've tried to help if she knew anything about cars but she'd mostly focused on swimming and bicycling in her day and neglected to pick up any of her dad's helpful car maintenance tips. Emily told her to wait for her and that she'd be right out but that was a full ten minutes ago and the kids were getting rowdy.

This was the first time she was alone with them and she was terrified. Terrified of hating them and blaming them for Alison's deeds. Terrified of loving them and having them torn away from her like Emily was.

She spied a park across the street, near enough to see from the high school but far enough from the foot traffic of the road. It was a decent little thing and the girls were staring longingly at it from the back windows.

"What do you guys say we hit the park for a while?" she asked. The reply was a resounding 'yes'. They unbuckled their seat belts and ran out the door before Paige even managed to get her window up.

* * *

The kids were still really small. So small they answered everything honestly for the most part. They only ever lied when they wanted something like cake or cookies. So Paige had found herself taking a real shining to them very early on. Everything she'd ask they'd answer, and sometimes they'd fill her in on background info to help support their cases. That's how she came to find out that they hated their English teacher because he was a doo-doo head or that Lilly's pink power ranger had a broken arm as well and she needed to take her to the hospital with Aunty Spencer so they could both get better.

It wasn't too long before the subject was changed to their mothers.

"Do you like our mommy, Paige?" asked Lilly, in a spur of the moment.

"Which one? You have like a dozen." Paige kidded.

"Momily!" Lilly rolled her eyes.

"Ah, her. She's a bit of a doo-doo head sometimes but yeah, I love her." Paige admitted.

"You love her?"

"Shh, don't tell."

"Okay. Do you love momma Alison too?"

Paige deliberated telling them the truth but she didn't want to hurt them or break their trust so she tried to be diplomatic.

"I don't love her as much as I love Momily"

"ME neither!" cried Grace from behind. Paige turned to look at her, questioningly but before she could ask what she meant she heard Emily's voice calling out to them from across the road.

"Looks like it's time to hit the road" Paige remarked as she took both girls by the hand, carefully leading them back to the car. Emily's heart warmed to see her holding the girls so firm yet delicately. She looked up at her, blushing with a half a smile playing on her lips when she reached her and it was all Emily could do to not pull her in and kiss that bashful look off of her face.

It was nearing lunchtime so they stopped at the brew for cookies and paninis -Emily insisted on paying- and on their way home they bought ice cream and talked about their day. They all got along so well that it felt like they were a family and when Paige walked Emily to her door it felt like she was coming home. But alas, the moment was only about as long as the fantasy she had of Paige the nymph. The moment she reached the door, Alison tore it open and started laying into her for not answering her calls. Paige clenched her fists at her side and excused herself before she made another mistake. Emily watched her leave despondently.


	23. Chapter 23

AN: Sorry for the wait. I figured I'd kept you waiting long enough, and I didn't want to keep you hanging any longer so I just uploaded all the remaining chapters at once when I had finally finished. Enjoy!

Paige did eventually get around to talking to Spencer in the hospital. It was on the third day, when all her friends were off at work and her mother and sister were getting the Hastings residence ready for her arrival. She smuggled in a coffee for her in a thermos she labelled 'soup' and was about to leave, thinking Spencer was still asleep, when she heard someone clearing their throat behind her. She slumped her shoulders as she realized she'd been caught and turned around with a hopeful half-mile half frown expression and filled her up a cup of water. After drinking a little to wet her parched mouth, Spencer began talking.

"So you're the one who's been sneaking me presents while I've been asleep"

"Yeah... sorry"

"Don't apologize, that coffee is the only thing keeping me from tearing this IV out" Spencer joked.

"Coffee is like crack for you. I couldn't let you go a whole day without getting your fix, it seemed cruel" Paige laughed back.

"Well, thank you anyway. I take it you're responsible for my outfit too" She said pointing at her pajamas. Paige answered with a blush and a head duck.

"Thanks for these too. I don't know what I'd do without you." She joked, pausing suddenly when she realized what she'd blurted out, before continuing. "They called you when it happened, didn't they? I never got around to changing my emergency contact number so you must've been the first one to hear. And even after everything you still cared enough to call my mom and bring me my stuff and you've been taking care of me behind my back, haven't you?"

"I didn't do it for a 'thanks' or so you would get back with me. I did it because I care about you and I just wanted to help and support you. I don't want us to fight but I don't to get in the way of your friendship with Emily either. I'm sorry, Spencer, I shouldn't have interfered. Everything that's happened is my fault. I'm the reason you and Emily are barely talking to each other and it's my fault for being greedy." Paige cried.

"Paige, it's not all your fault. I was also a part of our relationship. And I should have never crossed that line again after what happened with Caleb. I'm sorry I put you through that. I'm sorry about everything. And I'm sorry I forgot to change my contact information. It must've been stressful to get that call. I'll change it as soon as possible so you will never have to bother with taking care of me again."

"Spence, it's not a bother-"

"Please, Paige, don't. The more you talk the harder it gets to give you up."

"Spence?"

"I lied, you know. I didn't forget to change my emergency contact. I just hoped that we could... You're the person I trusted the most. I'm sorry for being such a burden in your relationship with Emily. I know you love her and I should have never gotten between that. You and Emily are both such stubborn givers. You always do what's right for everyone else and neglect what you want for yourselves. So I'm stepping in and I'm putting my foot down and insisting that you go and get what you want. You go and get her because I did NOT just give you up so we can both be miserable." Spencer confessed, starting to tear up. Paige was stunned for a moment but as soon as she realized what was going on she leaned in and gave Spencer a hug and one last kiss.

"...Thank you." She whispered after a pause, before walking out of the room for the last time.

"So this is how it ends, huh?" Alison spoke up from her perch outside Spencer's hospital room. "Not with a bang, but with a whimper."

She uncrossed her legs and stood up before taking off down the hall in her old candy striper uniform.


	24. Chapter 24

Spencer got back home later that day. A few moments in, her sister got called into work and her mom was volunteering to drive her in and pick up food on the way back. Dad was still in Wisconsin on a business trip and Melissa's new boyfriend, Adam, was visiting friends. Spencer was all alone. She shifted around the kitchen getting dinner ready, knowing full well her mom and sister wouldn't be home for hours and then she sat in her room, with her arm propped up by several pilfered pillows, eating and watching tv.

She looked over at the rocking chair Toby made her when they were dating. She remembered sitting there with him but she also remembered sitting there with Paige, rocking back and forth until they fell asleep in each other's arms. Suddenly she felt like starting a bonfire with that chair. Why did she have to sit on it with the people she let herself get closest with? It used to bring her comfort but now the only thing it brings her is pain. With her good hand she texted Aria to see if she was busy the next day. She was going to need help putting the chair in the attic and company when she went out to shop for window seats. She always wanted one of those and she shouldn't have to go without just because Emily had one first. It wasn't some sort of faux pas to imitate one's friends like that, was it?

This had nothing to do with Paige, she tried to convince herself. So what if she'd told her she liked window-seats and she'd always loved lounging with Emily on hers. It wasn't as if installing a window-seat would suddenly bring her back. And besides, she let Paige go, so Paige is going to either leave town or get back together with Emily. Either way she'll stop being tortured by her and her friends and that's the real goal: Paige's happiness. She would do anything to preserve that, including break her own heart. She knew all along that any happiness Paige gave her was borrowed from Emily and one day she'd have to give it back. She just didn't know how hard it would be to give up.

* * *

Emily held her tongue as she tucked the girls in. She knew the game she was playing was dangerous but it was the only thing keeping her from doing herself in. It's not that she couldn't live without Paige, it's that she didn't want to. A life without Paige wasn't a life she wanted to be living. Even if she had everything: perfect house, perfect kids, perfect wife, perfect job, etc, she still wouldn't be half as happy as she would be with Paige. She would trade it all for another moment with her.

That's why this situation was impossible. She truly loved her, more than anything in this world, but she had kids now and they were her world. Everything she did had to be for them. This was the price she had to pay for motherhood. Her heart for their lives. That was the cost. Not at all a fair price but one she had to keep paying because she made a promise to her father that she would be somebody he'd be proud of and when she saw him up in heaven, she intended to look him in the eye. Paige understood and that's what made it that much harder. Because she knew she was her soulmate.

She finished tucking the kids in and waved them goodbye, then, alone, in the darkness of her room she let her mind wander as it usually did, to what it would be like if Paige were here. She screwed her eyes shut and imagined the mattress dipping as she got into bed. She could almost hear the springs squealing in anticipation. She would turn towards her and brush the hair out of her face before kissing her goodnight and they would fall asleep together, their hearts and minds and souls in complete sync. She'd wake up in the morning to warm coffee by her bed because Paige always took care of her in the mornings, and the kids would be downstairs eating waffles by the time she got up, and laughing and having fun.

She'd kiss her good morning and give her a hug and they'd dance and make breakfast together. Morning drop offs with Paige in the car, singing along to songs at the top of her lungs to make the children laugh. They'd kiss each other goodbye at the start of the work-day and she'd walk into school with a smile. Grocery shopping, cooking dinner, would all be done as a family and at the end of the day, Paige and her would cuddle up and watch the children play together before picking them up, tucking them in and getting ready to do everything again the next day. It would be Idyllic.

She felt tears fill her eyes as Alison crawled into bed beside her instead, and turned her face away to avoid the stench of alcohol filling up the room. Alison barely registered the movement, too lost in her own stupor to care. She rolled away from Emily and passed out as Emily screwed her eyes shut, and tried to hold on to the memory of Paige's face. She had to tell her soon. She couldn't keep living like this. The children seem to like her well enough, and even if they didn't, she had to do this because when she was with Alison she felt like she was dying.

* * *

Paige affixed the goggles to her face and took a deep, steadying breath. She counted herself in and dove into the pool at the Rosewood leisure center. It was a small gym in the mall but it was big enough to include a pool and the cost -while exorbitant- allowed the place to remain open all day and all of the night. Money was not an issue for her; it never had been. Her father made it clear that she didn't need to work, he would cover any and all expenses and when she was ready she could either take the business on or sell and have enough money to support herself for life but she insisted on making her own way through life. She prided herself on her independence. Which is why she needed to be here right now.

These feelings of helplessness and weakness in general kept her from sleeping. She would close her eyes and see Emily's wounded expression when she turned her down or Spencer's teary face when she said her goodbyes. She was tormented by both but unable to help them both so the only thing she could do was stop by this gym and stay up all night beating her frustration out on this punching bag or swimming away from her troubles. She wished things could be simple just once in her life. That Spencer would stop sacrificing herself and come after her. That Emily would just choose Alison and stop torturing her by baiting her with the idea that they could ever possibly be wished she had the strength to walk away from both women and find her own place in the world but like a sick addiction, she couldn't just get up and go. She needed to see this through. She needed to figure this out for all three of them.

* * *

A mysterious figure approaches Paige in the middle of the mall parking lot after she has worked out her frustration for the night. A voice asks her to help them light their 'fag'. Before she can reach into her bag, she hears a thud as a sudden weight comes down on the back of her head just before the world goes dark.

* * *

Alison is gone the next morning before breakfast.


	25. Chapter 25

She wakes up in a cold, damp room she's never been in before. Her head is pounding from the hit and when she reaches back to check, she finds dry, caked blood mingled with her auburn hair. There's no light except from a small slit under what appears to be a heavy, metal door, and she feels nothing as she feels around the room, blindly. The walls are tough and after checking she determines they're made of some sort of metal. There's no window or any other means of escape and for now she appears to be alone. She sits down and feels along the ground. It's also metal. There's absolutely no way of escape.

A few moments later the door swings open and she's excused by a voice that reaches her over a well-hidden speaker and orders her to make her way over to the recreational area for morning activities. Blinded by the sudden light, she takes a moment to rub her eyes and blink rapidly until she regains her sight and after looking around and noticing that there is absolutely nothing inside her room, she gets up and walks out into the hallway, turning in the direction indicated by the hallway lights and following their blinking lights all the way down the corridor.

"What is this place?" She asks aloud as she wanders down these desolate hallways.

"Isn't it obvious?" A voice she's dreaded since high school speaks up "This is the dungeon A took Emily and Mona and the girls to." Alison explained, remembering it from the 0.25 seconds she spent inside it.

"What are we doing here?" Paige wondered aloud again, her heart thumping in her chest at the sudden realization.

"A must be trying to finish what she started!" Alison remarked nonchalantly.

"But Cece's dead! Alex is gone! Who could be doing this?" Paige asked.

"If I knew I wouldn't be standing here."

Paige rolled her eyes as she continued making her way down the hallway to what she presumed to be the activity room they were supposed to get to.

'this sucks balls' she thought. 'It's not bad enough that I get kidnapped by A, but now I have to deal with _her_? This sucks serious balls' She repeated again, like a mantra.

But as much as they both hated being here with one another, they were both secretly glad that at least they weren't facing this alone. While it's true that they hated each other, they both had to admit that the other woman was good at what she did and having one another there could prove to be advantageous. Alison knew that Paige was strong and extremely protective of Emily. She knew that in a pinch she could use that to her benefit. And Paige knew that Alison was manipulative and knew how to get to people and that could come in handy when they confronted their captor. Neither girl voiced these thoughts because they were busy observing their surroundings. Both women were very perceptive and it wasn't long before one of them figured out a clue.

This wasn't the Dollhouse. At least, not the same Dollhouse. Paige noted the dampness before but it wasn't until they reached the rec room that she heard the rushing water. They weren't underground, they were in a cave behind a waterfall.

The voice instructed them to play. In front of them there was a table with a deck of cards. Paige picked them up, and shuffled them, dealing Alison and herself a hand. They silently played a round of poker with no incident. Then when Alison shuffled the cards and started to deal out her hand, the word 'cheater' flashed in lights behind her and smoke began to seep into the room from some small vents near the floor, as the din of an alarm filled up the room. Alison groaned and reached into her sleeve, pulling out the card she'd tried to pilfer and condescendingly throwing it onto the table. Paige shook her head, in disbelief at Alison's antics, just before she passed out from the smoke. She awoke back in her room an hour later, hungry, sore and cold. Not only did she have a splitting headache but the place she was hit felt like someone had tried to pry it open with a crowbar while she was sleeping. She rolled up into a ball and tried not to cry as Alison started to wake up from her own nap...


	26. Chapter 26

Paige woke up in her satin pajamas in bed next to her wife, Emily. She kissed her good morning and they cuddled for a while before they both got up for work. Paige and Emily got in the shower together and made out, giggling under the water torrent as their dogs barked at them to hurry up from outside the door. They dried their hair and dressed up before waking the kids and half pushing, half carrying them to the kitchen for breakfast before dropping them off at school. They hold hands in the car. They kiss goodbye and go their separate ways. They meet for lunch and stare affectionately at each other as Miss May gossips about some funny student or other and they are content because they have all that they want. They have each other.

Emily walks her to her office after lunch and kisses her before scuttling off back to work and Paige works through the rest of her shift with a dopey grin and then she picks up Emily and they drive off to pick up the kids and go shopping and do all the other amazing mundane things she always wished they would do. They tuck their kids in and say 'nighty night' and then they shut the door on the rest of the world and look into each other's eyes and speak the language of sighs under the moonlight that seeps in through their bedroom window. They fall asleep content in each other's arms but Paige doesn't wake up with Emily. She wakes up in the Dollhouse, to the sounds of a manufactured voice telling her to go and take a shower. She screws her eyes shut and tries to wake up from this nightmare before she realizes that this is for real, and the life she has with Emily is the dream.

She walks into the communal showers and starts to rinse off. Alison's washing up in a different stall. She hasn't slept in a day and it's starting to show. She looks fatigued and her reflexes are slower. Paige had to help her into her shirt when she couldn't figure out which way the buttons went. Paige tried to brush the blood off her scalp and she managed to for the most part, but she also managed to accidentally scrape her scalp and open her wound up all over again. Alison handed her a tissue which she used to blot at the blood to no avail, until she eventually gave up and waited for her skin to just scab over the way it normally did.

The second day was less eventful.. By the third they managed to get down a routine. Alison was not improving and Paige's gash was getting infected, giving her massive headaches and A was pumping gases into her room making her feel like things were crawling under her skin. She scratched until her arm bled, which was when she realized that A was trying to get her to open new wounds on her skin and she stopped, no matter how difficult it was to put an end to it.


	27. Chapter 27

Spencer was confused. Nothing was really registering after the words 'Paige is missing'. She didn't understand how a thing like this could happen. It was impossible. There was absolutely no way this could be a thing and yet Paige's dad looked upset and her mother was crying and Emily was by the woman's side and she looked devastated also and this had to be a prank but it wasn't. Paige wouldn't do such a thing.

Spencer couldn't figure out what happened. Was she snatched? Did she run away? Did something happen? Could she be lying in a hospital as a 'Jane Doe', struggling to take her last breaths or maybe she was in a shipping container, being trafficked. Her mind conjured up the most terrifying scenarios. She thought about reaching Caleb and asking him to maybe check her phone, but she was sure that her family had already been all over that so there was nothing to do but sit and wait and hope and pray, but Spencer was never good at that.

It took less than five seconds for her to decide to call Mona. She was in Peru, in the middle of a book tour -not hers, but something she worked on- and when she'd heard that Paige -and Alison, she supposed- was missing under mysterious circumstances she was nevertheless intrigued enough to book herself a flight back home. Within a day she found her car, mobile phone and house keys, all scattered around town and all lacking any decent clues. Alison's stuff was even less helpful, her car having been used by Emily, absentmindedly, and cleaned, after her disappearance, and her keys having been dropped in the bathroom by the girls, but they were able to find her wallet, and noted that none of the money was stolen, which was anything but a good sign for the people involved. It meant this wasn't a mugging gone wrong, this was probably intentional.

Spencer couldn't figure out why but this all seemed slightly familiar. She wasn't able to place what she was thinking, she was just sure she was on the verge of a breakthrough. She remembered being at a party after one and she remembered Paige being there and she remembered being slightly drunk and Paige carrying her home essentially and she knew there was something important about this memory, she just couldn't figure out what. Twenty four hours with no sleep and she was looking at the puzzle, she just wasn't seeing the bigger picture. She couldn't. Her brain was fried.

After a long, deep sleep, it came to her in a dream. Paige had been drinking too but she had not seemed drunk at all. Paige had unnaturally high alcohol tolerance. She couldn't have gotten drunk and wandered off and gotten lost like the police suspect, she had to have been taken by someone.


	28. Chapter 28

Alison wakes up in a clean, white room. She has all these tubes attached to her and she doesn't feel well at all. She looks around but there's no one near so she calls a nurse to ask what happened to her.

"You mean you don't remember what happened to you?"

"I don't even remember what I had for breakfast... if I had breakfast."

"Ok hold on, let me page the doctor".

Twenty minutes later and Alison reveals she does not remember a thing. Barely even registers her own name. Thinks everything she's heard was just an elaborate story.

Paige is in a different room on life support. Her infection has gotten worse and she has been put in a completely sterilized room no one's allowed to enter until it heals. Spencer and Emily haven't left her waiting room, deadlocked in a competition of loyalty, as if that's going to help Paige determine who she's going to be with for the rest of her life.

Emily's mom has been watching the kids and Spencer's mom has been watching the women, bringing them food and sternly advising them to rest and recuperate.

They still don't know what really happened down there. Paige has been out this whole time and Alison has forgotten it. It seemed like a miracle when the girls were found the other day, on the side of the road, dressed in weird pajamas but Emily and Spencer didn't care, they were just glad that Paige was back. That she was home safe and sound. Until she wasn't. Until she was held for observation and until her fever incapacitated her, putting her in a state of deliriousness the doctors didn't know when she'd wake up from.

No one had any clue of what was going on, until Paige suddenly and abruptly reached lucidity.

In her haste to tell her story she rushed through her physical exam and spilled the beans on the kidnapping before constable Maple even got his writing pad out of his pocket. By the time the police began the manhunt the culprit was already gone and two armed guards were stationed outside Paige's room by the time Spencer and Emily were allowed to enter and got to hear her story.

* * *

It all started when they were trapped in the dungeon. Alison said some things that seemed to alarm Paige and slowly she began putting it all together. She wasn't receiving the same treatment as Alison was. Alison may have been covered in wounds, just like she was, but she never really acted like she was injured. When Paige limped, Alison would remember to limp as well but when she moved on her own she'd move more naturally... more fluently. Her theories were confirmed when Alison asked her to pass her a piece of fruit and she threw it at her, and Alison caught her with the arm she'd kept in a sling.

That's when everything changed. Alison's demeanour suddenly turned stony and she looked at Paige like she had just stolen her favorite toy.

"Didn't think you'd figure it out this soon. Heck, I didn't think you'd figure it out at all. How long have you known?" She asked, circling her like a vulture inspecting its prey.

"I've had my suspicions since pretty much the first night." Paige replied, doing her best to keep Alison in her line of sight.

"What gave it away?" Alison inquired, raising a brow in a condescending gesture of superiority.

"You never really seemed interested in getting away, only lessening the punishments... Almost like you were content to stay here forever. There were little hints here and there. Tiny imperfections in your act. The shampoo you use changed, and so did your clothes. I figured if 'A' was trying to recreate high school like Cece did with Em and the other girls, that she'd handpick your outfits from your high school closet, like mine. You've been wearing those ugly sweaters you started wearing when you got pregnant instead" Paige recounted on the fingers of her hands.

"It's not my fault those stupid yellow shirts don't fit me anymore!" Alison burst out.

"I didn't mean it that way!"

"Oh sure you didn't. Nobody ever means it 'that' way, do they? Everyone's too 'nice' to say I've gotten fat. Well, let's see you squeeze into your high-school Sharks jersey after squeezing out a couple of leeches you never wanted in the first place."

"Well, I don't exactly see myself having babies anytime soon."

"Then I guess I've pushed your schedule up."

"You didn't... no, you couldn't possibly have. Tell me you didn't!" Paige whimpered, realization dawning on her as she subconsciously wrapped her arms around her stomach.

"Why would I tell a lie like that when it'd be much more fun to tell the truth and watch you suffer. You're carrying Emily's baby."

"No!"

"Yes!"

"But how? Why?"

Alison smirked.

"It wasn't fair you know? That I got stuck with her because of those stupid babies. I was supposed to be the new and improved Alison who was all 'nice' and reformed so I couldn't just abort them, plus when Emily asked me to have them I figured she'd be forever indebted to me if I did and I wouldn't have to keep up that charade that I'm in love with her or whatever in order to get her to cater to my whims. I had it all figured out. The only thing I didn't count on was you. Who'd have thunk that Pigskin would have self esteem now and be too proud to stick around and help Emily raise another woman's bastard?"

"Wait, but if you didn't like her then why did you marry her?"

"You think I had a choice?" Alison shrieked. "After I tried practically whoring myself out to keep her from getting back together with you I got stuck pretending to be in love with her. I had to keep up the charade after you left to save face, otherwise I'd be forever known as the asshole who led Emily on and kicked her when she's down to get one over on her high school rival."

"How could you do this to her?"

"I would say 'easily' but the whole 'pretending to be gay' thing wasn't really a picnic. Ugh. You wouldn't know what it's like, you're a dyke through and through, but shoving your face in someone else's cunt? Ugh. That's why god invented men; so we don't have to put ourselves through that."

"I knew you were a magnificent liar but I never thought you could stoop this low."

"You think that's impressive? Wait 'till you hear the kicker! You've seen the twins, right? Emily's twins? Emily's blonde, blue-eyed, Caucasian, identical twins? Did you know that those sort of twins run in my family?"

"Oh no." Paige whimpered again.

"Oh yes." Alison rejoined. "After Archer went and got himself killed, I had nobody to pawn them off on. I wasn't gonna be some single mom at twenty four, changing diapers and living on government benefits. I stashed my money so that the babies couldn't touch it, and when you came back to town I was stalling something fierce because while I hated the pregnancy, it got Emily and the gals to treat me like an invalid and constantly give me the benefit of the doubt so there were some huge perks.. When you came back I was struggling because suddenly Emily lost all interest in catering to me. I could see it in her eyes, she suddenly had that spark in her eyes and a skip in her step. This wouldn't do. If Emily was happy with you there was nothing I could do to coerce her so I had to play the victim act and when that didn't work, I resorted to faking being in love with her, and when that didn't work either, because the idiot fell in love with you, I had the most brilliant idea..."

"I think I'm gonna be sick."

"It was so incredibly easy to convince her. She didn't even look at the pregnancy test results! I can't believe I spent three hours forging them for nothing! And then when she told you, oh boy, I was watching, you know? I'd never seen anybody look as broken. Really, I felt so proud of myself. That was quite the achievement. I could have never brought you to your knees like that by myself, but Emily has the destructive power of a thousand atom bombs. It was brilliant, really. And you left town so quickly because you were distracted by your broken heart, that you never stopped to think things through or wonder why on Earth A would be kind enough to warn us before we might have made a mistake." Alison finished in a mocking tone that made Paige want to squeeze her throat until her eyes popped out.

"You used her. All this time, you've been using her!" Paige cried out, righteously enraged. "SHE TRUSTED YOU AND YOU USED HER!"

"Careful now, you're yelling for two...or maybe even three, who knows? Emily certainly seems to think herself capable of bearing twins with her eggs, so..." Alison joked, completely unaffected by Paige. "Retract your claws. Hurting me would only hurt you more.

"Why?"

"Why? Why should everyone else get to be happy while I'm stuck in Rosewood with these brats? Look at me!" She said, grabbing Paige by the chin and forcing her to look her in the face. "See this? I was meant to be a star! I was supposed to get famous! Not waste away in some backward town raising some snotty nosed brats. I was meant to be respected and beloved. Admired. I was gonna make it big. But then life happened. I'm not gonna bore you with the details but rest assured, I wont be making the same mistakes again. You're gonna disappear and I'll have escaped the new A's clutches and arrive home a hero. Emily will be so relieved that nothing happened to me that I'll be able to squeeze the victimhood of being kidnapped for years! She'll wait on me on bended knee and take care of those little brats for me while I heroically share my story with the media, becoming America's sweetheart -I'm gonna insist on playing myself in the movie version of course- and I'll finally reach the level of fame that I deserve!" She gloated before picking a syringe she'd kept hidden in her sling. "Just stand still for a moment" she whispered as she advanced on Paige.

Suddenly, to both of their surprise, Paige's instincts kicked in and she reached out with her leg and kicked the syringe out of Alison's hand. Alison stood there and watched it go flying as Paige landed her foot and twisted her waist around, performing a second, harder kick, which landed square in the back of Alison's head, knocking her down. The rest was something out of a farce. She fell on the syringe, which broke and started pooling around her as she sprung up, her leg immediately becoming numb due to the effects of the chemical. She dragged it through the broken glass of the syringe, accidentally cutting herself, causing blood to mix in with the chemical. The traces of iron in her blood reacted with the chemical concoction and created a spark to fizzle out and the discarded sling to catch fire. The fire triggered the alarm and the sprinklers came on dousing Alison and causing her to slip and fall and hit her head, giving her a concussion.

The rest -as they say- is history. Paige fished the keys out of Alison's pockets and dragged her along with her to the main control room. From there she called the police and waited for them to arrive with Alison, by the side of the road, after taping Alison to a desk chair. The police managed to find them in record time, but by the time they got there, Paige's pneumonia had spiked. She tried telling the cops the truth as soon as she woke up but it was all to no avail. Alison disappeared the moment everyone got distracted with the news that Paige was waking up and in the time it took the police to take her statement, she was gone.

When Paige heard the news, she was paranoid that Alison would come back and finish what she started. She was the only witness and she'd have wanted her dead so she couldn't testify in court. If she eliminated her, she might have had a chance to sway a jury so she knew that Alison would be coming back for her.


	29. Chapter 29

You can spend your whole life with someone and think you know them inside and out but then one day find out something that's a complete game changer.

Emily thought by now she had the hang of Alison but as she sat there, listening to Paige's story she felt the bile rise from her stomach and tickle the back of her neck. How could she have been so wrong about her? She should have never given her any chances. She suddenly retreated into the palace of her mind and went searching through her memories for any indication that backed up what Paige was accusing Alison of but she never noticed anything wrong. She squeezed her eyes shut. She tried to see if Alison was false but couldn't, so that must mean that Paige isn't right, but she knew in her heart of hearts she had to be, and that she'd never make up anything like that so she looked back in her head again and tried to remember if there were any small moments, this time around, that might indicate that Alison's feelings were false.

She remembered a party where the adults were standing around the barbeque and someone insinuated that Alison put a ring on her finger and she rolled her eyes. She never noticed it before but Alison had always been against PDA and when they were in public she almost acted as if she was ashamed to be seen with her. In fact she never initiated any contact between them at all, both at home or otherwise, except for when Emily was upset. When Alison did or said something inconsiderate and hurt Emily's feelings, she'd suddenly switch and try to put the moves on her. Was this all just a way to get her to forget about what they were arguing? Was she stalling or placating her with sex acts?

She tried to think back to the birth. Alison insisted that she wait outside. The nurse made some comment about whether she wanted them to call her husband and Emily dismissed her remark as ignorance but what if she was still in cahoots with her husband? Was he still alive? Or what if Elliot or Archer or whatever- wasn't her husband? What if it was someone else all along? What if the babies belonged to someone else? Emily shuddered at the thought. Even if they weren't her own, she'd already grown so attached to them that there was no limit to what she would do to protect them and if Alison was working with their enemies, then she might turn out to be one of the things she has to protect them from.

Suddenly she shot up, reached for her back pocket and snatched her phone out, frantically dialing her mother's number.

"Mom... Are you and the twins allright?"

"Of course, sweetheart! Everything's fine, what's the matter?"

"It's Alison!"

"What's wrong with Alison? She seemed fine a moment ago!"

"You saw her? When?"

"Just now! She just came and picked the girls up. She said she was taking them out. She said you were staying behind to support Spencer."

"Do you know where she went?"

"No, sorry. All she said to tell you was "don't wait up" for her. Then she got in her uber and went off."

"Oh, Jesus Christ!"

"Emily, what have we said about using the Lord's name in vain?"

"Don't do it.. Is there anything else you can remember? Anything can help."

"No, I'm sorry."

"What about the car? Anything?"

"No. It was a dark blue sedan, that's all I know."

"You let her just drive off with the kids?"

"No, somebody else was driving. I assumed it was an uber, I didn't get a good look at the driver. But I think it was a man."

"Allright, don't go anywhere. I'm going to tell the police what's just happened and they'll probably want to go over everything with you."

"Emily, what's going on?"

"Alison's not the person we thought she was. She kidnapped Paige... I think she has something to do with the A's."

"Oh my goodness. Listen, if it helps any, I noticed she had a different phone with her. It was some sort of android. Maybe the police can try tracking it..."

"Thanks mom. That actually might help a lot."

Emily turned around and immediately dialed Hanna's number. After two exasperatingly long rings, she answered. Emily quickly caught her up with everything and asked her to get Caleb to check if he can find that phone her mom was talking about. She gave her the exact time she left, the exact street number and he checked the wifi to see if anything had connected around that time. Luckily enough, Alison's phone had opened a bluetooth connection and been sharing some files around which enabled him to hack into her phone and create a connection. While he wasn't able to switch the GPS on, he DID manage to copy her files. Her recent calls indicated that she'd been in touch with another burner phone which was stationed in Alberta, and she also had a missed call from Hong Kong.

None of this was making any sense so he decided to comb through her photographs for anything out of the ordinary. Sure enough, he quickly stumbled onto something he recognized; a picture of Noel Kahn's cabin. She posed for it recently, doing some outdated duck lip pose. He quickly texted Emily and Spencer and before Hanna even finished her phone call they were on their way to the lake house.


	30. Chapter 30

"Listen Emily. When all is said and done, Paige is your girl."

"What do you mean?"

"I see the way you look at her when you think nobody's watching. I don't think she's ever looked at me the same way. No matter how much I want her, it's you she loves."

"Spencer, I can't do this with you right now."

"I know. And you don't have to. This has gone on long enough. When we finish up at the cabin, you should go visit her and tell her you love her again and that you have my blessing."

"I can't..."

"Yes, you can. You love each other. You should go be happy."

"I've hurt her Spence... I've hurt her too much. She should be with someone like you. Someone who protects her and takes care of her and treats her as good as she deserves. I've never been good enough for her. I don't deserve to be with her. You should be with her, Spence, not I. I'm dumb and I keep making mistakes and breaking her heart and she's an absolute angel who forgives me, everytime, even when I don't deserve it."

"Because she loves you"

"And that's exactly why I have to let her go."

"What are you saying?"

"I love her too. Too much to keep doing this to her. Something always comes up and ruins things for us and I am so sick of doing that to her. I am so sick of watching her heart break because of me. So you should be with her. You've never hurt her before."

"That's because we've been so lucky. We've had no 'A' or anything even close to that. The biggest fights we've had were over what to have for dinner! Em, you survived THREE A's together. You've been committed for YEARS! If it wasn't for the babies, Paige wouldn't have even looked at me twice."

"But I did have the babies and I can't ask her to stand by me and help me raise them. Not when they look so much like Alison. I can't even imagine how painful that would be for her."

"More painful than living without you? Look, you don't have to decide now, just know, if it does happen...if you two get back together? I wont hold it against you. I wont be mad at you. I understand. I am releasing her."

"Spence" Emily sighed exasperated, but she didn't get to finish her sentence. They just turned into the the driveway leading up to Noel's cabin and Spencer switched the car off to give them the element of surprise. If anyone was up there, they wouldn't be able to get around the car on the narrow dirt road, and they'd have to try to go on foot if they were startled, which would give Spencer and Emily a better chance of capturing them.

Sure enough, up the driveway was a car. It wasn't Alison's car. Emily didn't recognize it. It was dark blue and covered in scratches and dirt as if the owner had been off-roading. She glanced in the backseat and saw a duffel bag, and a couple of storybooks littering the seats. The trunk was open and another bag was stowed away there. The girls heard movement and immediately dashed and hid behind the house where they watched somebody in a black hoodie lug another two duffel bags out the cabin and into the back of the car. Emily was about to pounce but Spencer held her back. She noticed he was squishing the bags down, as if he had more to stash back there which gave Spencer an idea. She dragged the bags around to the other side and hid them behind the wheels so no one could see them as they came out, and then she ducked into the trunk of the car. Emily waited by the cabin door and then tailed the hooded gimp all the way to the car where Spencer kicked the trunk door into his face and Emily bashed him over the back of the head with a branch, knocking him out.

They didn't have time to check in on him as they heard footsteps coming from inside the house. They dragged him to the other side of the building and dumped him in the woods and watched as Alison came out to check on the progress of the hooded man. She only went as far as the car, checking the trunk and finding it empty to her dismay. She yelled at her companion to hurry up and stormed back into the house to yell at the toddlers to shut up. The noise was getting on her nerves and she still had another phone call to make.

Emily and Spencer crept in through the side and front door. They made a beeline around Alison, hiding around corners and behind walls until they reached the living room with the kids. Each one grabbed a child and shushed them before lifting them up and silently carrying them away. Alison didn't even notice them come in and out. A few minutes later, she reclined in the kitchen, stirring her coffee and smirking, thinking proudly of how brilliant she was and how she managed to get away, and even got the kids to shut up by yelling at them -which was something Emily never let her do- and while she was patting herself on the back on a job well-done, she failed to notice the smoke bomb the swat team threw in through the open kitchen window.


	31. Chapter 31

AN: I'm playing around with the idea of continuing this series in a second volume, using the October prompts from the fanfiction reddit. I realised as I was posting that there's more than a couple of loose threads. Paige's pregnancy for example. So if I do get around to the October prompts, then consider the story as continuing on from there, otherwise, just disregard the loose threads, PLL style, and imagine they all lived happily ever after in the end. Except for Alison.

Emily sat the tray of cookies down onto the playroom table. She sat down on the recliner with her book and smiled down at the girls and their friend, Lonnie. Two hands started delicately massaging her back. She smiled and leaned back, in an attempt to capture a pair of lips with her own, but the face she found looking down at her was a thing of nightmares. Alison's corpse stared down at her with disgust. The hands on her shoulders wrapped around her neck and started to squeeze. She tried to pry them off but she was too strong. She felt herself fading away.

Then it stopped.

She woke up in a cold sweat in her old bedroom. Her mom was in the door before she knew it, cradling her and holding her tight. It wasn't until she heard her mom's soothing voice that she realized she was screaming still.

* * *

It was noon now and she was still waiting for Hanna to meet her for brunch. While she was never the most punctual of her friends, she was far from the slowest. The pregnancy must really be doing a number on her. Hanna rounded the corner with her pram and her nappy bag but without any of her kids.

"Don't even ask" she warned, out of breath as she unceremoniously flopped down on the seat across from her. "You're lucky you don't have any kids. They're a nightmare!" She said, gesturing towards the mushed up squash on her new brand name sweater. It didn't take long for her to realize just how bad she'd messed up and a sympathetic hand touch was administered before Emily had even had a chance to dry her tears.

"How are you holding up?" she asked, softly this time. Much softer than yesterday.

"I'm good. I'm on this new medication. It should help with the nightmares and stuff."

"And have you had a chance to visit them?"

"No. I... I haven't gone yet."

"Em, it's been a month!"

"I know! And I'm going to visit but.. I just... I can't see them like that. It breaks my heart knowing I'm the reason this happened to them."

"Emily it wasn't your fault. How can you blame yourself?"

"Because I rushed into it without even thinking and I'm the one responsible. I should've known better."

"You couldn't have known, Em!"

"I should have!" Emily whisper-shouted, angrily.

"Okay, how about we talk about something else?" Hanna asked, trying to change the subject. She knew that when she got like this, nothing could snap Emily out of her funk.

"Seen any good movies lately?" Emily asked sarcastically.

"Love story. Girl is torn between two girls. Chooses one. Gets rejected. Chooses the other. Gets rejected. Have you heard of it?"

"I think I'm familiar with that one. Yeah."

"What happened Em?"

"I told Spencer, I didn't want her pity. I didn't want her to give up Paige for me. I didn't deserve Paige. I never will."

"Enough."

"Sorry?"

"Enough is enough. I have had it with your self loathing. It's like you want to be miserable. Like you want to be punished for whatever reason. Okay, you fucked up. EVERYBODY FUCKS UP! And everyone deserves second chances!"

"This wouldn't be my second chance, Han, it would be my fiftieth!"

"You and Paige are meant to be together Em. You think anyone else would have given you fifty chances? Paige loves you! You have someone out there who's in love with you and willing to overlook everything and still wants to be with you, even after your fifty stupid chances, and you're sitting around moping and feeling sorry for yourself instead of shagging them, right this very instant?"

"It's not that simple!"

"Yes it is!"

"Spencer-"

"Spencer is not the issue here. She told you she can handle it. The problem is that you just don't want to be happy. You don't think you deserve it after everything that happened. But those girls wouldn't want you to sit around your mom's home all day, crying and looking at old photographs. They'd want you to get your shit together and visit. They'd want you to find someone that makes you happy and settle down with them. They'd want you to move on and move in with Paige and ride your bikes around with each other all through the day and eat grapes and make love at night."

"The girls want that?"

"I may have projected a little."

"You're really working that 'day of the week' calendar, Han."

"It's my greatest accomplishment" she laughed.

"Even if I wanted to, I wouldn't know how to even begin to approach her"

"Start with a 'hi'. In fact she's right over there, why don't you go practice on her?" She smirked before pushing Emily out of the cafe seat she was nestled on and onto the cold hard ground, just next to the check-out counter that Paige was standing in front of. She smiled up at Paige, who offered her arm for steadiness and her ears to hear her troubles and her heart, to keep.

Alison explained away the kidnapping. She placed all the blame on her male companion and played the victim once more. He was charged and imprisoned while she accused Emily of lying and cheating and won custody of the kids. She moved them, immediately, all the way up to Beacon Hills. Emily hasn't had a chance to visit, too crushed by the turn out and too scarred by the fact that Alison managed to get away. She wants to visit but she's too scared. She sends them letters when she can. She writes about all of the things she wishes she could do with them. And in return they write back and complain about their mother, Alison.

Emily knows that legally she has no right to those kids but in her heart, they're still hers and it's been hard to let go of them. Compounded by the fact she wont have Paige. She wont allow herself to be happy because she feels too guilty for getting the kids stuck with Alison. Spencer made up her mind. She'd let Paige go. Paige didn't fight it. She didn't challenge her decision. She respected it. She was sad but she let Spencer go because she believed it was for the best. That being with her would only cause her more pain and misery.

And Emily did the same for Paige. But now? Seeing her in this line at the coffee shop? It's easy to let her go when she's not around. Easy to ignore her ghost but the real flesh-and-blood thing? The genuine article? Emily was a goner before Paige even turned to look at her. The moment her perfume wafted through her nostrils her knees went weak and she nearly hit the floor. She knew then, that her struggle would be over because if Paige so much as looked at her, she'd jump onto her and never let her go. And that's exactly what she did.


End file.
